𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐞 [COMPLETE]

𝐞𝐬𝐭. 𝟎𝟒𝟕 { Secrets or Confessions }

"𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚐𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚢𝚘𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚖𝚎."
~~~

𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐞'𝐬 𝐏𝐎𝐕

Two months prior

"Arms up for me."

I raise my hand from my sides and out horizontally.

Cool air rushes down the length of my fully exposed body. I shudder, knowing if I glance even an inch to my left I would be met with the object of my fears.

"I know this next part might be a bit uncomfortable but your weight is very important in this assessment. So if you could step onto the scale. It'll only take a second."

My breath hitches but I managed a soft nod. Using one foot after the next, I press the sole of my foot against the cool metal. Then the other until a hard click is heard beneath me.

In my head, I visualize the numbers climbing one after the other to somewhere I couldn't possibly reach.

Infinite.

I try my best to focus on anything besides that. The room was empty. Just an examination chair and pale white walls. No pictures, no colors, charts telling you what to and not eat or weird looking medical devices that doctors probed you with during your adolescent years.

I remember hating annual doctor visits. Especially since mom refused to leave the room during the physical exams. Everytime she looked at me with disgust, that's exactly how I saw myself. Disgusting. Unworthy. Selfish. I closed my eyes and tried not to throw up at the thought of myself being a pound heavier.

I avoid looking off to the side where the nurse scribbled a bunch of measurements into her clipboard.

"That will be all. You can get dressed and the Doctor will be with you in just a few."

I nod, not having the courage to say the words thank you after she had invaded every ounce of privacy I once had.

Once I'm fully back in my matching sweatsuit suit there's two hard knocks at the door. In comes a devilishly handsome tall doctor with a warm smile plastered to his face.

"Ms.Winters, correct?"

"Yes, that's me."

"Fantastic. I am Dr.Pierre, the Physician on call today. I see here you've requested an evaluation. Can I ask why?"

"I was hospitalized a few months ago and the doctor on my case recommended I get one done to be sure." I clarify.

"I see." He flips through the pages of my chart, realization seeping into his features. "In fact I think there's been a minor mistake on our part. You are actually supposed to see the mental health specialist instead. She's right underneath us on the second floor. I can try to squeeze you in with Dr. Vasquez before her lunch."

"No, no, I don't think you understand." I let out a short dry laugh but nothing about this is at all humorous. "I'm here to see a doctor, not some psychologist."

He seems a bit taken back. "Ms. Winters, I didn't—

"It's Sage. Please call me Sage."

"Right, Sage. I didn't mean to offend you. It was far from my intention."

"No, I'm sorry." I sigh. "That came out a lot harsher than I intended. What I meant was I already attend therapy and I guess it hasn't really been working so when you suggested I go to Dr.Vasquez I kinda just flipped."

"That's completely understandable, Sage and I apologize if I overstepped any boundaries but here if I'm reading this correctly. This assessment is for Body Dysmorphia, which is a type of mental illness."