₊ ᘐ ꒰my messy akaza related writing! ₊˚ ・

⁺◟ 🌙 ﹒memories﹒！♡

☆﹕❀﹒welcome to a new chapter~!

﹒category ﹒ıllı﹢=angst
→characters﹐⿴﹒=akaza, gender neutral! reader, reader's modern era family
ᶻz  notes﹒♡﹐= cringe warning+ art above not mine

﹒⁺◟ let's start！♡﹒

you woke up in.. wait. your room? your decorations around the room felt familiar but foriegn at the same time. you were back.

it hit you.

that body numbing flash of realization.

you look at the clock, it reads 4:15.

it had only been hours. the- what, five? nine? years- years-! - spent in the world you now called home had been merely hours. nothing. the precious memories reduced until it was meaningless now. the man you loved, and who loved you back.. barely a figment of your imagination. your love, as if it never existed, and the painful hurt had always been. the tears wouldn't stop coming.

a flash of lightning lit up the night view outside your window, as you cried yourself back to sleep, mourning. you missed them already, so much.

--

the next morning, you woke at 6, and got out of bed at 2, when your mother had dragged you out. a steaming plate of hot food was slid in front of you. you swallow.

'i'm not hungry.' you say quietly. that was a lie. your stomach was begging in agony and twisting itself over and over on the sight and smell of food. but you had no appetite; you couldn't bring yourself to eat.

'what the hell am i supposed to do with the food then?' your mother snapped. 'throw it away?'

wasting food was heavily looked down upon in your household. you had forgotten, because everyone in kny accepted your small appetite and adapted willingly. Inosuke used to eat what you couldn't, and akaza didn't care. he loved you either way.

he loved you. why am I using past tense? we love each other.

..

oh, right.

you could barely stop yourself from bursting into tears.

⁺◟ next！♡

you pause in the middle of a bite. 'why's it so bland?' you ask quietly, genuinely curious.

the family goes silent. 'i thought it was too salty', your brother says, looking away from his game. 'you okay?' your older sister asks, followed by a short laugh, hiding her clear concern.

you look down at the food, and realizes it was your mom's signature dish. you had taught it to akaza, when he asked about food you liked. no, its him! he made this. he's here, its okay. he's in the kitchen, cleaning up like he usually does. the bite in your mouth bursts in flavor, and its the most delicious thing ever. the world gained back that beautiful vibrant edge- your heart blooms with proudness for his improved cooking. you were about to open your mouth and praise his cooking, before his pair of arms wrapped around you lovingly from behind.

'do you like it?' his voice flows perfectly in your ear. filled with anticipation. almost dreamlike.

'i love it!' you breathed.

'do you have a fever?' your father's voice rings out. it seems to shatter everything. the arms dissolve, and the food in your mouth withers to ash. the world is monotone again. 'those are covid symptoms.'

'i don't think so.' why is my voice so shaky?

'hey, did you say something before? i think i saw your mouth move.' its your older sister. she's crouching on the edge of the sofa, knees propping up her sketchbook. an elaborate set of watercolours sit beside her, along with a cloudy cup of water on the coffee table.

she looks at your confused expression and laughs awkwardly. 'nevermind! I swear i saw it, though. hey, come check out this painting i made of your favorite character. still don't get why you simp for him so much, though.'

akaza. i'd do anything.

you're beside her in an instant- jaw dropping in awe of your sisters talents. never fails to amaze me. you stare at the beautiful painting for a while longer, before his blue tipped fingers move, and reaches through to stroke your face. your heart melts, and you unconsciously lean towards his figure. they brush back your hair gently. his expression turns into one of tender love.

'you're beautiful, y/n. my darling.' his pale but warm lips kisses your forehead sweetly. 'i love you..'

'what's the matter?' your sister's voice cuts through. 'you're smiling like an idiot.' she tilted her head. '..in love. an idiot in love. keep the sketchbook, it has more paintings of him.'

he's just a character.

your smile fell, so you force it to come back up. you look up. 'thank you, so much!'

'i'm glad you like it.' your sister says. she cocks her chin towards one of the pages open. 'that one's wet, so wait for a bit before you turn the page.' 

you nod. 

⁺◟ next！♡
(Sister 3rd pov)

y/n's older sister was was walking down her house's hallway, carrying an armful of new art supplies, when she noticed her sibling's door opened slightly. 

they never do that, s/n thought. she peeked inside, merely curious, then immediately winced from the stab of guilt. it evaporated the moment she noticed what y/n was doing. concerned, s/n looked on. 

y/n was sitting on her bed. their arms held the sketchbook tightly, gaze pinned on the thin air in front of her. a look of such profound joy on their face. 

'i love you.' a barely audible whisper came from y/n's lips. their legs moved just a bit, and they fell on the bed. they laughed as if someone had pushed them down. 

'i love you, akaza.' 

s/n's eyes widened, and stopped herself from gasping. she saw her sibling's arms reach out to embrace him, before closing on the air around them. 

their arms fell down. 

s/n felt even her heart crack a little at the expression of confusion then realisation on her sibling's face. the light in the room seemed to physically dim as y/n curled up on their side and cried where her sister couldn't see. 

⁺◟ end! ıllı.

1000wordsB)

but then i go on my laptop and its 979 *dies*

⁺◟ see you next time！♡﹒