Through Khadoos Shergill's Eyes

Where Do Broken Hearts Go?

Karan wasn't particularly fond of dancing. It was something he couldn't comprehend, no matter how hard he tried. He simply couldn't make head or tail where to put his foot next.
Cue: Stepping on Monami's foot while dancing at the welcome party. So he refrained from dancing.

But lately, things have been changing. A certain doctor was making him dance to her tunes. Literally and figuratively. And tonight was no different. On seeing Monami's puppy eyes, Karan melted faster than ice cream and agreed to dance with her. Give it a few more days and Dr. Monami Mahajan might create a professional dancer out of him. But truth to be told, he was a lot better than he was before. Now Karan could dance at least without stepping on Monami. She's a good teacher, that's for certain.

Karan felt quite exhilarated after dancing with Monami tonight. They were in sync like they had been dancing together since forever. And Karan liked it. He liked what he felt at that particular moment. It was a new feeling for him, a new emotion. Deep in his heart, he did know the reason behind it and was somewhere afraid to accept it. He caught himself before he could sink any further into his whirlpool of thoughts. Karan decided to retire early to bed.

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It was way past midnight. Karan was standing in a gazebo, waiting for someone. Suddenly he felt a tap on his shoulder from behind. He turned around and what he saw next made him blush. There stood Dr. Monami Mahajan in a white gown, looking ethereal in the soft moonlight. She looked just like an angel.

He extended a hand out to her. Monami chuckled and kept her hand on his. As their skin came in contact with each other, it seemed to them as if two universes have collided. A shiver ran down their spines.

Karan pulled Monami closer. Her chest collided just where his heart was. Keeping one hand on her waist, he slowly swayed to the rhythms of his heartbeats. Monami was right. One can dance if they listen carefully to the beats of their heart.

Karan twirled Monami. A light autumn breeze gently caressed them and goosebumps broke out on her bare forearms. Karan hurriedly took his coat out and draped it around her. She looked so tiny in his big coat. He laughed.

Laughing all the way, they both went outside the gazebo and laid down on the soft grass. Looking at the sky, they drew constellations together. Karan stole a glance at Monami. A huge smile was on her face. He felt at peace.

Suddenly dark grey clouds came out of nowhere and covered the entire sky. Karan looked up and saw that the moon was hidden behind the clouds. There was darkness all around. A loud thunderclap broke out in the sky making him roll over to his side.

Karan's eyes snapped open. Beneath him laid Monami Mahajan, all starry-eyed. He grew bewildered. "Tum?!"

Blushing, Monami looked deep into his eyes. Karan felt as if someone has penetrated his soul. Still disoriented from the dream he had back then, he stared right back into her hazel brown eyes. They were beautiful, weren't they?

Looking straight into his eyes, Monami spoke, "Tumse kuch kehne ayi thi... Karan Shergill, I love you!"

Finally, Karan could figure out the emotion he was seeing in Monami's eyes for the last few days. It was love. Pure, true love for him. The love which he didn't deserve. The love which he was not worthy of.

Karan slowly got up from Monami and turned around. She followed suit.

"Karan", Monami spoke blushing.
"And I know ki tum bhi mujhse pyaar karte ho."

Not a question. A statement. A fact.

Karan shook his head. He didn't love her right? It was just admiration, wasn't it? He, Karan Shergill didn't love Monami Mahajan. Yes, he didn't love her. He just admired her. There's a difference.

"Nahi Monami. No!" Karan responded sternly. "Monami, hosh mein ho? Kya bol rahi ho?"

The smile didn't leave her face. She instead responded softly, "I know tum bohot shy ho. Aur tumhara, mera aise achanak se, yeh sab aake kehna ajeeb lag raha hoga, right? Lekin kisiko to kehna padega na? Toh maine socha main hi bol deti hoon".

Looking up at him, Monami Mahajan laid open her soul and spoke those three damned words. "Ek baar phir se keh rahi hoon. I love you, Karan!"

One look at her face and Karan knew that he had to break two hearts that night. First- that of the girl in front of him, who had just confessed her undying love. And second, that of his own heart. Because he believed, that he doesn't deserve Monami. He doesn't deserve a soul as kind-hearted and pure as her.

Karan and Monami, the idea of the two together was like a distant dream. Unattainable. They were like two parallel lines destined to never meet.

Walking away from her, walking away from the hidden truth, Karan spoke, "Monami, do baatein."
"Ek, yeh nahi ho sakta." He sighed. "Dusri baat, yeh ho nahi sakta hai Monami".

Speaking in a rush, he blurted out, "Main tumhare liye sahi nahi hoon".

There laid the naked truth out in the open. He was not the right person for her. Monami Mahajan deserved the world. But not him. He was not worthy.

Monami turned and faced him. "Karan ek baar meri taraf dekho...Ek baar apni dil se puch lo....ki tum mere liye kuch feel karte ho ki nahi. Look at me, Karan. Ek baar meri taraf dekhkar bolo... boldo ki tum....tum mujhse pyaar nahi karte", she demanded, her voice cracking.

Karan turned away from her. There was the Monami he knew. Always demanding answers from the very moment they have met. But he had no answer now. So he did what he was best at. He asked her to leave.

"Monami, you should go."

Karan found it beyond his comprehension that Monami loves him. The only question that revolved in his mind was, Why?

She came and stood in front of him. "Toh phir meri ankho mein dekhkar ek baar boldo.. boldo ki tum mujhse pyaar nahi karte. Kyunki ankhon mein sab kuch dikh jata hai. Gussa.. nafrat....pyaar."

Her voice trailed off.

"Maine tumhari ankhon mein pyaar dekha hai Karan."

Karan blinked as if to get rid of the emotions in his eyes.
Monami continued, "Please ek baar boldo meri ankho mein dekhkar..Boldo ki tum mujhse pyaar nahi karte."

Karan looked at anywhere but Monami. He couldn't see her crying. It did something to his heart.

"You should go Monami".

Monami stood there, tears streaming down her pretty face.
He shouted, "Monami, go!"

A sob escaped from her lips. And that's when Karan knew that he had hit the final peg on the nail. He turned around only to find her running away.

"Monami! Monami"

He stood there all alone in the corridor. It was too late. What's been done has been done. He had successfully broken two hearts tonight. A snide voice in his head whispered, Congratulations Agent Shergill, Mission Heartbreak successful.

•••••••••

"How to fix up a heart that I let down
Now, I'm searching every lonely place
Every corner calling out your name
Tryna find you, but I just don't know
Where do broken hearts go?
Where do broken hearts go?"

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A/N: I'm afraid that y'all might find this chapter not up to your expectations. This is my interpretation of the scene, so views might differ.

Ignore mistakes if any.

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