To Be Made Whole (A Christian Romance) (On Hold)

Chapter 10: Jealousy

This morning, I didn't have the usual hop in my step. It was Sunday and although I felt excited to hear the rest of Pastor Nick's sermon, I also felt weary to see Rafael again.

I usually walked to church, but this time, I decided to take my bike. The flowers from spring were falling as the bright tree leaves took their place instead. Feeling the wind flow through my curls as I cycled past each beautiful landmark, made the trip rather enjoyable. More enjoyable than walking for once.

I made it to the church in just a few short minutes and parked the bike along the empty bike rack outside. My dress had wrinkled slightly due to how it had been positioned as I rode here, but it would do. I wasn't here to impress anyone.

I brushed the lilac colored fabric downwards. The smooth silk of it draped over my legs and it was soft to the touch.

Deep breaths, I thought. I had to collect myself. If Rafael was here today, I promised that I wouldn't bother him. Although a friendship ending so soon made me feel sad, I could respect his boundaries. A part of me just wished that he had told me instead of disappearing on me.

Upon entering the building, I heard voices all around. It brought me the same comfort that it always did. I smiled towards the familiar faces of Laura and John. From the corner of my eye, I could see Pastor Nick, yet once I fully looked over I realized who he was speaking with.

Rafael.

He stood there in his usual attire. A black button up paired with black slacks. As always the button up's sleeves were rolled up his arms. It appeared baggier than usual and upon further inspection, I noticed that he even appeared to be slimmer. Although I found this odd, I shrugged it off. It wasn't my job to pry or to bother the man who wanted space.

Before I could tear my eyes away, his hazel eyes snapped to my own. His gaze seemed to intensify and so I quickly walked away before he could exit the conversation he was already having.

Keep your promise, I lectured myself.

I walked over to Laura and John instead. They were laughing with Kevin and do I waited for a pause in their conversation before greeting them.

"Hi Laura! Hi John!" I said with a bright smile on my face.

Laura looked over at me, still recovering from her hearty laughter.

"Oh hi dear," she said lovingly. She playfully smacked John's arm, which quickly brought his attention back, before his eyes fell on me too.

"Oh hi there, hun. My apologies, Kevin here had us laughing at something silly." He said with a vibrant and jolly smile. His dark brown hooded gaze moved over to his wife as he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close. She leaned on his arm and looked so comfortable right there. It was as if they were two souls perfectly intertwined as one.

I can only dream of having that one day, I mused.

"How have you been, dear? I didn't hear from you this week, so I hope that means that it went very well." Laura said with a contented smile on her lips.I felt confused by her words, but shook it off.

"My week was okay at best," I said with a cringe. "Lots of academic studying and I'll be busier next Saturday too."

"Oh really?" Laura asked.

"Yes, I have some volunteer work I have to do. I did some yesterday in the late afternoon and I'll be doing some next Saturday too." I said with a smile.

"Oh well that's very sweet of you!" She praised. I felt bad because it wasn't initially out of the kindness of my own heart, but instead it had been out of desperation for a better grade.