Rose petals

Chapter 1

It's been one thousand five hundred and forty two days since I saw the light in your eyes dim. It's been one thousand five hundred and forty two days since I saw that gorgeous smile that made my entire week. It's been one thousand five hundred and forty two days since I last heard my favourite sound, your voice. It's been one thousand five hundred and forty two days since I last heard my second favourite sound, your laugh. It's been one thousand five hundred and forty two days since I last held you. It's been on thousand five hundred and forty two days since I last kissed you. It's been one thousand five hundred and forty two days since I last felt you.

It's been one thousand five hundred and forty two days since you left me.

I'm convinced I'm living a nightmare, that all I need is just one big jolt and I'll wake up. Wake up holding you in my arms in our bed, in our apartment, with two sleeping newborns. Id give anything for that to happen, I'd give my life no questions asked.

It isn't till I'm reminded that I'm responsible for two little lives. Our mini me's, Elle Rose Black and Emerson Flynn Black. This isn't one of those 'gone but never forgotten' moments, you truly will never be forgotten. Not for as long as I live, and for as long as our kids live. You live through them.

"Dad, Elle stole my Ironman." Emerson yelled outside my office as he came storming in with his sister hot on his tail.

Putting away the letter in one of my drawers in the desk, I turned to my four year olds with a wide smile.

"Yes, my loves?" I asked as I opened my arms for my two four year olds.

Momentarily forgetting their little argument, they came running over as fast as their little legs could take them and wrapped their arms around my neck. I lifted them up off the floor and the two of them burst into a fit of giggles, sounding so much like their mothers.

"Daddy, I just wanted to play with him." Elle groaned as she threw her entire body backwards knowing I wouldn't let her fall.

"Don't do that silly girl, you'll hurt yourself." I scolded as I pulled her back up, a silly grin on her face. The same grin as her mothers.

"But you'll save me!" She giggled as I shook my head in amusement and kissed their cheeks.

"Uncle Aid said he was going to pick you guys up for a sleepover, are you excited?" I asked already knowing the answer.

They've not shut up about this sleepover since Aiden promised them three days ago. Kai, Elle, and Emerson have been the best of friends for the longest time. We have family dinners once a week, they have the same friends, they love the same things, they'll be going to the same school, and the list goes on.

"Aunt Hayley said we can bake brownies, mommy loves brownies." Emerson grinned in excitement as my mind went back to the hundreds of times we went to our campus bakery for a box of brownies, especially while she was pregnant.

"Yes, she does love brownies." I said as I kissed their heads and put them down. "Go get your things, and don't forget Mr and Mrs Bananas like you did last time." I said as I gently pushed them towards the door.

The day we lost her was the same time I vowed to make her present in our children's lives for as long as I possibly could. From the time they were newborns I'd play videos where she spoke to them just so they'd recognise her voice. I used one of her hoodies that was actually mine as a blanket for them so they recognise her scent. Id sit them down and watch her favourite movies with them just so they know what they mum used to be like.

She was robbed of the one thing I never would've imagined, not in my worst nightmares, the time with her kids. She was taken far too early and I'd be damned if I didn't do everything in my power to bring even the smallest piece of her back.