Dear Diary... Nosipho's Life

Dear Diary 41: Date Night

Going back to school hasn’t been easy but it’s all getting better, even with us living in different houses, Ashley is still a great help. Every day when he comes, he looks after the baby while I do my school work and take a nap for at least 2 hours and then we hang out for a bit before he leaves. Assa’s sleeping pattern is on and off, sometimes she sleeps for most of the night and sometimes she just doesn’t want to sleep, she literally wants to sleep in my arms for the whole night, when I put her down, she wakes up.

I’m also struggling with breast feeding, my milk supply is amazing but the pumping at night, morning, having to go to the bathroom during lunch to pump is all draining and I feel horrible that I’m even considering getting her off breast milk and back to formula milk.

Today I woke up feeling amazing because it’s Saturday, I get to rest and tonight I’m going out on a date with my man, we haven’t done this in the longest time, I’m excited to spend time with him, just the two of us. I don’t know where we going or what we doing, he said it’s a surprise. I already asked Tumi to babysit and she agreed. When I woke up, Assa was already awake in her crib, she wasn’t crying, I changed her diaper and put her next to me in bed.

Me: Mommy and daddy are going out on a date and Aunty Tumi will be looking after you, are you happy to spend time with Aunty Tumi?

She was baby talking and smiling at me

Me: Yes you are, my beautiful angel, I can’t wait till we have actual conversations where we understand each other

My phone rang and it was Ashley

Me: Look, daddy is calling

I answered

Me: Hey babe

Ashley: Morning my love, how are you?

Me: I’m good you?

Ashley: I’m great, is that my princess I’m hearing?

Me: Yep, we were in the middle of a conversation

Ashley: Put me on a speaker I wanna join the conversation

I put him on speaker

Me: Done

Ashley: Hey baby, what are you telling mommy?

Me: She’s telling me that she’s excited to spend time with aunty Tumi, aren’t you baby?

As if she could understand what we were saying, she was talking back, smiling, trying to grab my phone

Me: Girl stop trying to grab my phone, just talk

Ashley: She has the sweetest voice

Me: Let’s see if you’ll still think it’s sweet when she’s up talking at 3am and doesn’t wanna sleep

Ashley: [Laughing] Trust me, I’ll still find that voice sweet, everything about my baby is sweet

Me: I know

Ashley: So how did y’all sleep?

Me: Great, she slept most of the night, you?

Ashley: That’s great to hear, I always feel guilty that she keeps you awake at night, then you have to get up and go to school while I sleep well throughout the night, I feel like I’m letting you take all the parenting responsibility alone

Me: That’s not true though, you literally come here every day to take care of her and give me a chance to do my school work and rest even when you are tired and had the longest day, you are doing the best in this situation, no need to feel guilty, you are doing amazing, you are the greatest father and boyfriend ever