THE END IS NEVER THE END II Countryhumans AU

2: TOURIST TRAPPED

Today was a real doozy it was. Seeing my boy's face, I didn't have the heart to yell at him. It seems that almost being impaled was enough for him. And frankly, my body feels like it's about to collapse. All the soul's been sucked out of me from this wild ride... And to make matters worse?

Aussie's here now, apparently.

So, while all three of us were having a moment, footsteps began echoing from down below, and it just became louder and louder. Wales' instincts snapped and he dragged us behind him as he grabbed a dusty brick laying around the corner for who knows how long. We weren't out of the woods yet and frankly me kiddo's 'bout to burst into tears again. All that until the mysterious fellow puts his hands up and starts smiling at us like the world wasn't crumbling as we knew it. If almost falling off the Big Ben wasn't gonna give me a heart attack, a surprise bloody reunion would have. He, Kiwi, and a couple others apparently have been staying neutral and been trying their best to stay off of any of the big two's radars. I don't know how they've managed to survive up until now, much less even get here, but at least I know they're alright. Unlike some others...

We ask him how he got here and all he says is "Australian technology!" All proud of himself like that totally helped with us understanding how he smuggled himself and his twin into London. We also asked why the hell they're here, and he explains: "Same thing the two of them are; the artifact. Though unlike those bloody lot of galahs, me and Kiwi may have found a way to actually find it without murdering half of the human race and destroying all that we have left of this planet."

"You tellin' us it's been in this ancient clocktower this whole time?" Wales goes. Aussie shook his head. "Nope," He answers nonchalantly. "But a clue could be. Whoever this mysterio of a mate is that hid the artifact centuries 'go left clues 'round so only those with the bestest of wits and greatest of braveries could find it. Won't get in the wrong hands and all that fancy." I roll my eyes at this. "Now that's just some proper bullshi-"

"Captain Kirkland's Time Travellin' Capers!" Sealand yells out like he's hit the jackpot. We all turn to him like he's gone absolutely bonkers. Aussie's eyes widen. "You know?!"

"Of course I do! That's why we're here. Coldest it is with one touch. Hands that carry the weight of time. Up the stairs with the whimsical chime-"

"-You'll know it's what you find when you feel such." Aussie continued. "That's it! That's the clue we've found over in our laboratory."

So that's why Sealand was dangling by the clock hand.

Funny how people call me insane, and for the longest time, I've accepted it, but no, this is just absolute ludricousy. I get in while Wales is still trying to comprehend all this. "Wa-Wai-Wait, so you're telling me, the illustrated nonsense for children like his is actually the secret to fixing this whole fiasco?"

"Yep!" Aussie chimes. "Unbelievable." I go, deadpan as ever. Australia chuckles, "Dad, I know you're the grumpy one, but we really are serious." I ended up facepalming. "Grumpy or not, this is just... Nonsense! Yeah the comics came from my people, but seriously, an entire world war, people suffering all around the globe because of the fight for dominance, some magical genie bottle that can solve everything, could be found with kiddie riddles. Are any of ya'll hearin' ya'selves?!"

Aussie and Sea nod together. Totally onboard with this. I glare at my older brother. Wales looks back at me, uneasy. Shrugging, he goes, "Well, it is what it is, Brit. Don't you see? It's bloody genius! Nobody would expect it to be that easy so they don't. They're struggling to find it 'cause they think the comics are a sham!"