It feels as though the ground is cracking and breaking beneath my feet. Placing a hand on my chest, I try to control my erratic breathing. "You have lied to me my entire life."
Tears stream down my face and I wipe them profusely, not wanting to be vulnerable. A lump of dreaded emotion forms in my throat and I try my best to swallow but it breaks out of me in a sob. I shake my head, as though it will rid me of this revelation.
"What was I supposed to do? You would have hated me whether I told you or I didn't. Sorry for not wanting my daughter to look at me the way she is now."
"And dad..." the word feels sour on my tongue. "He just played along, or did you make him think that it was his baby?" I ask and she places her thumb and forefinger on her nose, closing her eyes.
"When I met your father, I had already had you, there was no lying on my part. He knew that I had a child with another man, and he was more than accepting. Your father welcomed me with open arms and appreciated that it wouldn't be time to tell you, for a long time, about your real father. But Sebastien has been more of a father than that man ever has. He has loved you like one of his own and I understand this will cause some tension between the both of you, but you must appreciate all that he has done for all of us."
My mind feels as though it is going to explode. "I..." I trail off before stalking towards the back doors. I need time to think and process all of this. Making eye contact with no one as I trail through the house, my cheeks stained with my tears, I make a b-line for my bedroom.
As soon as I am in the safety of those four walls, I crash onto my bed, burying my face in the pillow. Letting out a scream full of fury and anger, I let the plush material swallow the loud noise.
My body feels numb with anger. My entire life has been a lie, the man I have called my father couldn't be further from it. But I also cannot shake the fact that my birth father could still be here on this island, could still live here.
Just that thought sends shivers through me.
Although, I feel no desire to find out his identity. I've lived without him for eighteen years and I've been just fine. He clearly didn't want me seeing as no attempt to connect had been made.
My eyes close at their own accord, my mind begging to rest.
I'm awoken by a soft knock at the door, and I look over to see my father... well, Sebastien, walk in with a small smile. "I understand if you don't want to talk..." he trails off.
"No, it's okay," I say, my voice croaky.
"Your mother said she talked to you about your real father, and I just hope that doesn't change the way you look at me. I hope that it doesn't make me any less of a father to you. Despite you not being my daughter genetically, you will always be my daughter to me. You have the right to be angry but just know that something like this... it's not easy to tell someone. It takes time and understanding," he says, and I feel the tears welling once more.
Wrapping my arms around my father, I try to hold back the tears but fail immensely.
He holds me for a while, telling me how much he loves me and how nothing is going to change. Eventually, he lets go and tells me to rest. Nodding my head, I watch as he leaves the room, softly closing the door behind him.
This doesn't have to rock my world; this is just a small blip that will change my perception of my childhood completely.
I understand my mother's incessant hatred toward Nico and me now but, I won't change who I love because of what happened with my mother. I refuse to let her past change my future.
YOU ARE READING
It Began In Italy | ✔️
RomanceOne last trip with her family before she goes to University. Her intentions for this trip were to spend every minute making memories and savouring the last moments she'd get with her family before she moved away. She did this, just not with who sh...