Macdonald Hall #6: Lights, Camera, Disaster!

The Short and Unofficial Career of Fred the Goalie

"... and then he gave me the fish eye and said, 'Walton, if you can honestly say to my face that smuggling the Jones boy into the dance wasn't your idea, you will walk out of this office with no punishment whatsoever.'"

A few boys were sprawled comfortably on the grass watching the movie set decorators building a seven-foot-high model of the Faculty Building.

"He let you off scot-free?" asked Sidney incredulously.

"Nah, I confessed. You know what it's like when you're face-to-face with The Fish. You think up all these great lies, but the words won't come out of your mouth."

Boots shuddered. "We should be grateful we got off as easy as we did."

"How's this?" said Pete, reading from a steno pad he'd been working on. " 'Dear Miss Scrimmage, How are you? I am fine.'"

"What kind of stupid letter is that?" exploded Mark. "We're supposed to be apologizing for wrecking the dance."

"I'm working up to that part," said Pete. "Besides, I didn't do anything to her stupid dance. I didn't even know that prince guy was Jordie Jones."

"If you had stayed here with me, none of you would be in this predicament," said Elmer seriously. Since Mark was busy writing, Elmer had been called into service to keep the videotape rolling for the documentary.

"Just keep shooting," said Mark irritably. "Hey, what are you doing?" Elmer now had the camera pointed up at the sky. "The film crew's over there, remember?"

"Yes, but there's a very fascinating formation of cumulonimbus clouds -"

"This isn't a documentary about clouds! I have to have footage of them building that model!"

"What do they need a model of the Faculty Building for, anyway?" put in Pete. "They've got the real thing right here."

"Because it has to blow up at the end of the movie," Mark explained. "Remember?"

"I'm with Pete," grumbled Wilbur, his letter to Miss Scrimmage already smeared with Cheez Whiz. "Let them blow up the real one. "

"You guys complain too much," said Bruno. "You just put, 'Dear Miss Scrimmage, Sorry we trashed your dance. Better luck next time, Yours sincerely,' and sign it. It's better than having to sit through a dull dance. This one was the best ever!"

"No one minds a little excitement," said Boots. "Within reason. It just stings to have to write an apology when any idiot could see that the riot was caused by Cathy, Diane, and the girls."

"The Fish is just trying to calm Miss Scrimmage down, " said Larry. "After last night, she bumped up her lawsuit by another twenty-five G's."

"Yeah, well, tell The Fish I'll testify," said Boots feelingly.

"I can't understand why those girls go so crazy when they see Jordie, commented Sidney, checking the security of his assorted Band-Aids.

"They're in love with him," said Larry.

"So what?" challenged Boots. "My mother's in love with my father, but she doesn't bust up the house every time he comes home from work."

Bruno shrugged. "They're sick."

"It makes you think, though," said Mark. "I always dreamed of being a big star like Jordie Jones. But that poor kid lives like a prisoner. He can't even go out to a third-rate dance."

"Without turning it into a first-rate dance," laughed Bruno.

"Mark's right, you know," said Boots thoughtfully. "What good is it to have looks, talent, money, and fame if you can't go out of the house to enjoy it because some nut like Cathy is going to tear you limb from limb?"