Macdonald Hall #7: The Joke's on us

The Romance of Swamp Germs

"Hey, Elmer, how come you're bringing your science notes to Scrimmage's?"

It was just after midnight and Bruno, Boots, Larry, Wilbur, Pete, Sidney, and Elmer were stealing across the Macdonald Hall campus.

Elmer spied the small card in Pete's hand. "They aren't notes!" he hissed. "They're conversation starters for when I meet Marylou Beakman!" Pete was confused. "But it's about swamp germs."

Elmer's flushed, red face seemed to glow in the darkness as he glared at the boys one by one. "I am terrified of what will happen if I am caught violating the curfew! I am petrified of Miss Scrimmage's school because every time I go there something awful happens! I am bowed down with raw fear at the thought of meeting Marylou Beakman tonight! Give me that!" He snatched the card out of Pete's hand. "My romantic life is none of your business!"

"I never knew swamp germs were romantic," put in Sidney.

"If you comedians are through making stupid jokes," said Bruno, "I can remind you we've got a job to do. We have to find out what the girls were doing last night on the videotape. Let's go."

They soldiered on, with Sidney bringing up the rear. In single file, the seven boys crossed the highway and moved silently over the fence.

Bruno dropped to the grass. "Okay, stick together and stay close to the trees." he whispered. "Who's got the dog biscuits in case Rex shows up?"

Pete held up a bag. "Right here. We didn't have dog biscuits so I had to bring bagel chips." "Hey, toss me a couple of those," said Wilbur. "I'm getting kind of hungry."

Elmer spoke up, his voice shaking. "You said Rex wasn't a worry because he was too fat and lazy."

"Oh, he's too fat to attack" explained Boots. "But if he starts barking, we'll have Miss Scrimmage on our necks."

Bruno led the group into the trees. He counted heads and came up short. "Hey, wait a second.

There's supposed to be seven of us. Who's missing?" The boys took stock of each other.

"Oh, no!" Boots exclaimed. "Where's Sidney?"

"Probably where he always is," said Wilbur in disgust. "Flat on his face somewhere." "All right," sighed Bruno. "Let's find him before the buzzards do."

They spread out and began feeling through the grass for Sidney's form. One by one, they checked in with Bruno.

"Nothing," said Larry. "No luck," added Boots.

"He seems to have vanished," confirmed Elmer. "He's capital-G gone," Wilbur moaned.

Bruno listened for Pete's report. It did not come. "Aw, no, not another one! What's going on here?"

The boys couldn't believe their eyes. Now Pete was missing, too!

"This is really weird," breathed Boots. "It's like there's a bear out there, eating us one at a time!"

"That's horrible!" quavered Elmer.

"You're telling me," Wilbur said morosely. "Pete was carrying the bagel chips."

Larry pulled his sweater tighter around him. "What are we going to do?" He took a shaky step backward and, before the boys' astonished eyes, he vanished.

"Whoa!" cried Bruno, heedless of the need to keep quiet. "Did anybody else see that?" "He just — disappeared — " Boots barely whispered.

"There is no scientific explanation for what we have just witnessed," was Elmer's analysis. "It is a paranormal phenomenon."