Ao3 story (Why would you ever kiss me)

Part 3

Will couldn't sleep that night. Everything was wrong.
It wasn't just the fact that no matter what way he turned his new body he couldn't get comfortable, it was also the way that he played his thoughts over and over. Mean ones. Inappropriate ones. Ones that made him wish he could rip his heart out of his chest.

Will quickly realized that he didn't need to be vecna'd in order to be mentally tortured, his mind was self-destructive enough to do it all on its own.

Since him and Mom and Jonathan were living with Hopper and El for the foreseeable future, it was quite honestly a bit cramped. El and Will shared her room now. El refused to sleep on the floor, even if it was out of his character to take the bed, but Will hardly cared. The cold reality of the hard wood beneath him helped to sober his thoughts anyway.

Becoming El was something he hadn't really given himself time to fully process yet. Did he have her powers in some way now, was that a possibility? He would have to ask her in the morning. If so, what would that mean for him? If something bad were to happen, he'd likely have to pretend to have her abilities if the situation required it.

Getting changed was something they figured out how to do rather quickly. It was a bit strange, but it prevented awkward situations. One person would close their eyes while the other basically dressed them like a doll. Weird. Certainly, but it worked. They hadn't figured out showers yet, but Will had already decided he would learn how to do it blind. Thinking about it all made his skin crawl.

Will tried to shut his thoughts off, willing himself to fall asleep. Even knowing that he was scheduled for a night full of nightmares. It was always the same cycle of nightmares, too. But something told him tonight was going to be especially worse after what Mike said today.

It starts with him as a young boy, overhearing his father scream about how strange he was, how Joyce let him quit baseball, about how she was turning him into a girly faggot. The scene shifts to him getting pushed off a swing by a boy with dark hair. A boy who he refuses to recognize as he kicks him in the chest and calls him slurs instead of asking him to be his friend. He watches El die. And he's the reason why. She's dead because of you. You don't even deserve to be alive. You shouldn't have been born. Will Byers. Kill them, Will. They never cared about you. Not like they care about her. Every negative thought in his head overlaps, one after the other, growing louder and louder every moment. The moment the roar of it all becomes too loud to bear he spurs awake. And it's morning.

He looks over and sees that El is still sleeping on her bed. Still occupying his body.
So no, this situation wasn't part of his other nightmares.

Will stands up and stretches, noting how his range of movement is different than before. He looks in the mirror. He will never get used to this, so it's good that it isn't forever. He notes with a frown that there are bags under his eyes and he hopes El won't be upset for exhausting her body. He doubts she will care much.
Will ambles into the main living space and finds his mom and Hopper in the kitchen. His mom is leaning slightly over the table, her fingers on the rim of a mug full of black coffee as she giggles at something Hopper said, who's smiling into his own mug of coffee across from her.

Will is happy for his mom. He's even more happy that she's happy with Hopper. It almost feels like they are a real family. A memory of the nightmare that he'd almost forgotten sparks to life and he shakes his head dismissively.

Jonathan is passed out on the couch, his mouth is open comically with a thin line of drool leaking out. The scene makes him chuckle to himself.
His mom and Hopper look over to him.

"What's this?" Hopper says with a surprised smile. "You're up early. What is it—" he looked down at his watch quickly. "Seven-o-clock. Damn, that has to be a record." Mom laughs into her mug and the sound echoes. Will almost forgets that he's El and this is probably out of character. She's not a morning person. At all. But Will is.