"Hey Scarlett!" I heard Chris say, "how are you?" They seems really happy to see each other.
Too happy.
I walk downstairs to greet him with my stomach telling me something was wrong.
"Hey Chris" I was nervous but couldn't find out why. "Hey Veronica. How are you?" I tense up, god I hate it when men say my name.
"I'm okay I guess" I know he's here to be helpful but I can't stand men. Not even the ones who I know are only here to help.
"Okay." It was awkward... extremely awkward.
"Well, Um, I brought food." I hope He doesn't think something will trigger me. He knows I had the fucking dream, that's why. Everything will trigger me right now then. He doesn't want to trigger me, which is nice I suppose. Fuck.
(Journal)
Sooo yeah, despite his efforts to not trigger me, he did. It was really bad and I don't want to do it but I just think it will make everyone's perfect fucking lives better. Me not being here.
I just want to die. I don't want to rid of the monster because I'm the monster.
I'm a fucking monster. I'm the monster that made my fucking dad cheat. That made my parents get a divorce. I'm a fucking mistake and I know it...
(Real life)
"Veronica. Veronica! Hey, hey, hey. It's okay" I couldn't breath. "Veronica, baby, it's okay. Look at me. Not him, me"
I gasp, I can't breathe.
"V? Hey. You're okay."
I wake up in a hospital bed once again covered in wires to see my mom holding my hand
"Hmm. How long have I been here?" I ask dased.
"Not long. You just passed out so it was precaution to bring you in." She didn't really tell me more though that might've been best.
(Journal)
Fuck fuck fuck! I swear to fucking god I'm going to die! I hate my panic attacks and to make matters worse I'm not going on meds! It's not even for depression or suicidal thoughts but for anxiety but my mom says that it's just to be safe.
I really feel like I need to go back on my meds.
Anyways see ya I guess,
Veronica
YOU ARE READING
Journal of Veronica Reynolds
FanfictionWarning: this has a very heavy topic of Suicide and verbal abuse and contains PTSD DEPRESSION and ANXIETY This story is about the daughter of Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds this story acts as her journal about how she tried to end her own lif...
