fake dating buckley - ronance

chapter 9

Robin was out of her seat in mere moments. By the time Nancy had pushed her own back and thrown a painstaking glare at her mother, Robin was already halfway up the stairs. Her footsteps were heavy on every step, and each thud felt like a throb in Nancy’s head. Her throat was dry; she didn’t know how she was going to fix this. What little trust they had built between them over the last week, the feelings that were real, despite what Robin might say next; all of it was at risk. Nancy grabbed the bannister to help propel herself up the stairs after the other woman. The door to her bedroom slammed hard, shaking the walls around it, but it didn’t dissuade Nancy from her cause. She had to fix it, and she had to fix it now.

By the time she reached the landing, Karen was hot on her heels and coming up the stairs behind her.

"Nancy." she hissed, motioning her back.

Nancy looked back at her over her shoulder and debated for a moment. She was angry. Like really, really angry. She wanted to give her mother a piece of her mind about many things; Harvard, pushing her own career, ruining her relationship – God, was there even a relationship there to ruin? She put her hand on her forehead and looked between her bedroom door and her mother. She settled.

"How could you do that?" Nancy demanded, though she kept her voice hushed. She marched over to her mother.

"Why doesn’t Robin know about Harvard?" Karen retorted, furrowing her brows.

Nancy began to reply, but she stopped dead when she realised the reason Karen thought it was a good idea to speak so freely. To her, and her father and Maya and the Byers too, Robin and Nancy hadn’t only been together for about two days. It had been six months. That was avid time to prepare Robin for something as big as moving to Boston. In fact, it was ample time to decide whether they’d try and make it work long distance. Could they do that? Nancy pursed her lips. She was angry about a lot of things, and while her mother was one of them, the main issue she had with the whole thing was herself.

"I thought you would have talked about it. It’s the kind of thing you mention when you’re in a healthy relationship, and she seems to love your very much-"

"I just didn’t tell her alright? It’s only been six months, we’re not talking about the rest of our lives here, and moving to Boston is a big deal, okay?" Nancy put her hands up and shook them. "It doesn’t matter. The point is that I haven’t even decided if I want to go. I like Chicago; I love it. I love my apartment, my school. I love living with Max and Barb, and having Steve and Eddie and El and everyone close by. My life is there… and I love…"

She trailed off, swallowing, and glanced back to her bedroom door.

"Nancy," Karen said gently. She touched her daughter’s shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Sweetheart. You can’t put your future – one as bright as yours – in the hands of one girl."

Nancy’s gaze was stuck. Behind the door was Robin, whose heart she had probably damaged beyond quick repair. Sure, she’d get over it and move on, find another nice girl who didn’t keep things from her, and she’d be happy. Nancy stretched her hands out at her sides; the thought of Robin being happy with anyone but her… She turned back to her mother, and looking at her with an ache in her chest, Nancy shrugged.

"What if she’s the one?"

*****

Barb tried to block out the cries of the woman down the hall. Sitting in the clinically white building, where her mother had been admitted just a day earlier, Barb was struggling to wrap her head around how, exactly, she’d gotten to be there. What had she done wrong in a previous life to have to deal with all the bad stuff in this one? She was exhausted, running on barely any sleep, and all she really wanted was a steaming mug of coffee. Preferably Irish. It was inevitable that Kali would bring her one, and moments later she did.