I lit another cigarette, and took another swig of vodka, letting the cool liquid burn my throat, thinking that if all the screw ups in my life came together, i'd probably feel as bad as i do right now. I don't drink and smoke to be 'cool' or for attention, in fact, nobody but my apartment walls have ever even seen me in my bliss state of drunken misanthropy. I do it to put my insomniac mind at rest, i drink myself to sleep. I was due to leave in 13 hours, i had my bags packed, but i didn't have a set destination, i was catching a flight to California, then i'll drive until i'm too tired to open my eyes, and i'll know i half way there. I soon, as expected, fell into a deep state of sleep, more like passing out if you ask me, but it was a start.
I woke still partially drunk from last night, on a buzz, but the hangover would kick in later, i was sure, i have 5 hours until my flight, it takes two hours to drive to the airport, as i live in the middle of nowhere, so i have 3 hours to sober up and get ready for my flight. Much to my dismay, i get myself out of bed and walked to the bathroom, i looked in the mirror at my half naked self, scrawny, tall, dark curls of hair hung around my face and truth be told, i looked a mess. I let the warm water from the too small shower cascade over my body, waking me up.
I chose to wear a pair of skinny blue roll up trousers, a faded college hoodie, a pair of red plimsoles and my backpack full of cigarettes, magazines, mountain dew, spare clothes, my boarding pass and my passport.
I took off in my car on the two hour journey to the airport. I had my suitcase in the trunk of my 2011 Dodge Charger that my stuck up rich family had bought me thinking that it could buy them back my respect, i was grateful for the car, but i couldn't ever forgive them for kicking me out as a naive 16 year old.
The two hours went quickly, every song i've ever heard that made me want to stay played through the radio, I was having the car put on the plane, a special 'present' from Dad, i suppose he wanted me gone just as much as i wanted to go. I made my way through security and boarded the plane, in 16 hours i'd be in California, 'The Golden State', i wondered where i'd end up, on my long drive, i wondered, but it didn't bother me too much, to be anywhere away from here would be a prize.