Pain is Only Temporary

1

I never understood the concept of love, to me it was nothing more than science. A chemical imbalance in the brain caused by the release of oxytocin.
The idea of love being anything more than a science was foreign to me.
It was just a reason to justify inexcusable actions in the name of "love". Then again, how could a person truly understand something that has never been shown to them; A mother's love, a father's hopes, a lover's ambition.
All things I have never felt; Never had the chance to witness. It was just me, all alone in the darkness that filled my mind, held captive by the silence. Silence... A funny word, silence, the complete absence of sound.
In a way, silence looses it meaning. I can show you. When you sit in the darkness too long silence becomes unbearable.
Then you hear a buzz soft and subtle in your ear and it's all you think about until it gets stronger defening your senses.
Loosing your grip on reality, all as a result of your mind playing tricks on you. But hey, silence is better than the darkness.
It is better than not knowing what is to come because silence always ends in silence; Bitter-sweet nothingness.
Darkness, on the other hand, is different. Darkness will consume you until you are nothing more than your pain and agony.
It develops in your subconcious and reaks across every inch of your body until you are nothing more than your darkness. Your pain.
Fear and terror stain your thoughts as they become louder then your words.
But what these have in common, you will soon find yourself yearning to be in the silence rather then the darkness because with silence, there is nothing.
In darkness there is uncertainty, and uncertainty can be a terribly frightful thing.

                                                                                                                -Tay

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The first day of school is, in my opinion, by far the worst day of the year.

Freshmen try to leave their mark on the world as they scatter the halls with their designer heels and nail laquer fresh from the salon.

Anxious to show off their new look to anybody unfortunate enough to look in their direction.

This is the day nothing is off limits, A free pass in essence.

Questions. Relationship status. The janitorial closet.

The school reeked of desperation and cheap cologne, lingering the halls after everyone has already made their way to class.

No, but all jokes aside, This is what I need to avoid. The stench of adolescense. I'm sure mom would understand...

Trk. Trk. Trk.

I looked to my alarm clock and let out a sigh.

3:45 a.m.

I read it again in hopes my eyes were still groggy in my first glance.

3:45 a.m.

Ughhhh. Why so early...

I closed my eyes tightly and felt myself slowly dozing off again.

The electronic pat of the clock ticking softly in my ear.

One. Two. three... twenty-four. Twenty-five-

The minutes started to blur together.
Drowsiness took over and I found myself sinking deeper and deeper into the slumber that comfortably awaited me.

»»»»»»»»»»»»

Beep. Beep. Beep. beeeep.

My hand slid out from the comfort of my sheets.
The alarm was cold to the touch and sent shivers down my spine, chilling my nerves.

Click.

The alarm silenced.

Thank God.

My hand fell gently to my side.

I tugged at the sheets revealing my bare skin to the current chill of my room, and slid over the side of the bed.

You can do this.

The silence that once filled the room quickly faded as birds began to chirp.

Morning.

I made my way to my bathroom, grabbing a towel and some toiletries before closing the door behind me.

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15 minutes later I stepped out of the shower.

The steam bounced off the walls an onto the mirror, clouding it entirely.

It was so warm and cozy.

I wrapped myself in a towel and headed back to my room.

Blaring Beyonce on my phone, I danced around my room like an idiot.

Back in the club. Doing my own lil thangggg.

I belted out.

If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on ittttt-

I turned to look out of my window, as the light shines through, my eyes settled on a figure of perfection.

His muscles flexed as he effortlessly slid his shirt into place.

A glorified badboy.
Clearly oblivious to my surroundings, Capers slyly skulked into my room though the creak in the door.

He walked towards me as I continued to dance.

Pawing at the loose string on the edge of my towel, he jolted towards my crashing into my leg.

I felt myself falling, stumbling in an attempt to keep my balance.

It was no use.

Amidst my failed attempt to keep from falling I pulled at the edge of my towel- disconnecting it from my body and sending it crashing to the floor.

I looked down, shock apparent on my face in an utter state of disbelief at the now crumpled cloth.

Seriously?

Nice going.