bittersweet

chapter fifteen

"i think i'm deeply in love with you."
Louisa heart pounded massively, she couldn't quite believe that David vocalised something she always wished for. her breath quickened and her cheeks flushed a light red.

David bowie was in love with her, a famous rockstar was in love with Louisa. she felt like it was like a lucid dream she manifested. no way was this real...

"w-what?" Louisa's eyes went wide, causing David to blush slightly at the delayed reaction. "i'm in love with you Louisa, i can't hold it in much longer" David stroked Louisa's flushed cheeks with his thumb softly, Louisa was just staring in pure overwhelming shock in response.
"David" Louisa croaked before sighing, "you can't be in love with me..."
David's face fell slightly, he didn't except such a mundane response after the deep connection they shared just a few minutes before. David sat up slightly so his head rested on the head board, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "what, why not?" Louisa also sat up and placed her hands delicately on David's, "David don't be silly, you have a full career ahead of you, you are a successful singer and also you have a wife and a child...please don't say things which could harm your life." David couldn't help but feel dismissed from his truthful emotions, he opened up to Louisa and he was automatically wasn't taken seriously. he felt stupid and his face portrayed his angered emotions clearly. "Louisa are you serious? i can't prove how much i love you anymore, you clearly don't feel the same" David stood up suddenly, Louisa sensed David's change of demeanour he looked angry? and Louisa just watched how he vigorously changed into his clothes in front of her, not making eye contact with her. "David please" Louisa pleaded from the bed helplessly, she knew David was sensitive but she didn't encounter anything so dramatic before. "i'm going now, i'm gonna go back to my WIFE...since how i left her with no explanation to come and save you from being fucking spiked" David ensured he stressed the word 'wife' loudly to reflect on what Louisa said.

Louisa was speechless, she couldn't believe such a magical experience could be destroyed with her insecure words of denying David's love. she felt her eyes fill up but she blinked her them away, "David don't go, i'm sor-" before Louisa could finish she heard David already walk down the stairs, a big senses of guilt filled her gut. why did she have to say something so careless especially when David finally opened his heart to her, David has been nothing but loving to Louisa ever since they met. she couldn't help but feel empty when he finally left her, alone in her room.
-
David manically searched for his phone, he did feel as though he may of reacted quite outrageously but he couldn't help but feel a deep sense of betrayal from her, especially because she didn't say it back. he muttered slurs under his breath as he searched the kitchen for his phone when a buzzing noise came from Louisa's purse on the table. temptations flooded into his mind, he felt incredibly intrusive if he checked her phone but at the same time he wanted to see who it was, maybe it could explain her behaviour of not affirming 'i love you' back to David.

fuck it just read it...

'hello Louisa, my name is will (the man who your mother set you up with.) i was just wondering if you wanted to go out for dinner this Friday, my treat! i'm coming down to London for the weekend from Cornwall so maybe we could get to know each other? let me know if your interested, luke x" 

Davids face dropped completely, he slowly placed the phone down back on the table, emotionless.
he couldn't vocalise how betrayed he felt, all of this 'love' Louisa showed him was clearly fake. she just used him so she could fucking tick of her bucket list that she shagged a rockstar. anger streaked through him and as if he manifested it, Louisa stood in the doorway, her face pale as snow.

David's eye-line remained on the table, "who is he Louisa?" he practically spat. Louisa was filled with confusion and she stepped into the kitchen, "who? what you talking about David?" David's eyes still remained fixated on the table, Louisa could literally see a vein popping from his neck. she sensed his anger tremendously and Louisa felt small in his cold presence. she still remained unknowing of his anger.
"you know what i'm fucking talking about. who...the...fuck...is...he?" David lifted his dominant gaze towards the trembling Louisa, shooting holes into her glossy eyes. "i don't know what your talking about?" Louisa nearly cried, but David shoved her phone towards her direction, he looked as though he was about to break down in tears. his eyes where bloodshot and it was a image Louisa hated, especially if she caused it.

Louisa looked down towards the lit screen and she scanned over the text from Luke, her stomach dropped with each word she read. she panicked tremendously as David misunderstood everything, "David it doesn't mean anything, i promise" David chuckled sarcastically in response, shaking his head."bullshit. who is he? your new fuck buddy you didn't tell me about?" David's thick British accent echoed the room, Louisa felt her heart in her mouth but she felt frustrated with how untrue everything he was saying about her. "no, no not at all...i just had to go along with it otherwise my mother would be mad, i only agreed for him to text me for the intention of me ignoring him" Louisa stuttered as she walked over to David placing her hand on his forearm. David immediately flinched his arm away from her, "get the fuck off me Louisa, i can't believe i fell for you, for it ALL. Jesus christ, i need to get out of here, i don't want to be in the way of you and your 'boyfriend Luke' now do i?" David began walking out of the kitchen door, Louisa pleaded as she hurriedly followed behind him until they reached the front door. David opened the front door, revealing the cold air which made Louisa's trembling body shiver immediately.

David slowly turned around as he was on the last step, his eyes where bloodshot and he was breathing heavily. tears where streaming down Louisa's eyes, no matter how much she tried explaining to David, he never once listened nor tried to understand. she felt helpless and she knew she would never see David again, and it was all her fault.

David opened his mouth slightly, trying to vocalise a sentence but nothing came out, he watched Louisa break down before him but he couldn't comfort her. he couldn't look at her the same from after not saying 'i love you' back and finding out she was seeing other men behind his back, considering everything he did for her. she has seen him raw and not playing the 'David Bowie persona' but rather she seen David Jones. and she threw all of his love in his face, he gulped down the pulsating lump in his throat.
"please...please don't bother calling me. have a nice date, hope it goes incredibly well" and with that David walked out of Louisa's house, not looking back , which caused Louisa to cry heavily in response.
"David, David please!" no response, he was gone.
he was gonna forever and it was Louisa's fault. she acted so cruel towards the love of her life, you always hurt the ones you love deeply. and Louisa punched her front door in tears of anger frustratedly, her body slid down the door and she buried her head in her hands.

she lost him, she lost the only thing she loved...