Hetty and Ryan: Overcome

Backing Off

Ryan spent all weekend physically resisting the urge to text Hetty. He wanted to apologize for not leaving her alone on Friday. He wanted to make sure she was alright. And he wanted to get inside her head and find out what the hell was the deal with all the back and forth. She had swung between scolding and softening towards him so many times that his head was spinning.

While preparing coffee and toast, the ping of a text message sent all the blood rushing violently to his head, bringing on an instantaneous headache. It was Tiffany.

Hey, last night was so much fun! I hope we can hang out again sometime!

Ryan didn't know how to respond, so he tossed his phone back onto the counter, sighing deeply.

For at least a full minute, he stared intensely at the hot coffee dripping into the pot. Then he snatched his phone back up and dialed his sister Danielle, who still lived in California.

"Hey, little bro!" she answered, sounding glad to hear from him.

"Hey, hey."

"What's up? You back at work now?" He could hear baby babble and fussing in the background already.

"Yeah, first week back. How's my Elly?" Ryan adored his niece, who had just turned one a few weeks ago. "Can you talk, Sis, or no?"

"Yeah, yeah! I can. Her daddy will watch her for a few minutes." The background quieted. "Everything okay, Ryan?"

"Yes, yeah - definitely."

"You have that sensitive soul tone."

Ryan laughed softly. "Yeah. I can't hide anything from anybody." He originally thought he would tell Danielle about Hetty, but it suddenly sounded so stupid. She was engaged. What did he expect his sister to say?

"Do you think I'm too picky with girls?" he asked, out of the blue.

"What?"

"Too picky. I never seem to fall for anyone. I mean, I go out with plenty of girls, but it never seems to go anywhere."

"You fell in love with one girl." Ryan held his breath. Was she referring to Madelyn, the one long-term relationship he'd had? Which had ended with him buying an engagement ring, only to sabotage the whole thing by picking fights and finding a way to distance himself until she eventually broke it off.

"Maddy?"

"Nah. You weren't in love with her, or you wouldn't have self-destructed the relationship so catastrophically."

Ryan sighed, knowing she was spot-on.

"I'm talking about your cutie-patootie from high school."

Ryan nearly fainted. "Hetty?"

"Yeah, the one who jump-started your music career," she teased. "You wrote some damn good songs for her."

As if he needed an explanation to know to whom she was referring.

"She was a pretty unique girl," said Danielle with a genuine tone.

Ryan heard his niece crying again.

"I've gotta go," said Danielle. "I can call you later tonight if you want, after she's asleep. To answer your question, no - I don't necessarily think you are too picky. Maybe you just haven't found someone you like as much yet. But you also have to be willing to open yourself up."

It had taken him a long time to move on after Hetty. More than one therapist had unearthed Ryan's propensity to close himself off to people, which they attributed to losing both his father and his first love in adolescence.