Captive In The Spotlight

Chapter Twenty Two

My existence has always been egregious,
I do not exist just for existing sake.
I am not obscure and my personality cannot be derided
I am apparent and visible to every sight.

I am a glowing light;
How many a path that is by me lightened
So as many crooked routes I have straightened
And many nefarious proclaimers I have frightened.

© Principle

"It's just a panic attack, please calm down. Just make sure she uses those drugs administered and I think mentally she's exhausted. Try and do something about that. Do not stress her at all please. You know what they say, your mental health is everything! So she can go home now." Musab thanked the doctor, they shook hands and he left.

Throughout the drive back home, Fateemah remained quiet. She looked exhausted, tired and sad. Musab kept glancing at her from time to time while her gaze was fixed outside the car. She wouldn't even stare at Musab for a sec. Numerous thoughts were racing her mind. Being a niqobite at this stage of her life is totally going to ruin her life. Not that it's a bad thing per say but it's not part of what she has painted her life to be. She planned to still serve in the army and her being an engineering student aspiring to be a petrochemical one at that. The niqob, she believed is going to be a big hurdle to her career. There's probably no way out of this. She has no excuse to give. She's not ready to disclose to her parents that she's a soldier because she doesn't know how they'll take that. If she wants to argue about her career and stuff, they'll probably tell her to stay as a full house wife cause her so called husband is more than capable. Not only that his family is extremely wealthy, but he himself is a medical student.

All she want to do right now is absorb in her pain and for her to get high on that, she needs to go back to what she always does. Self inflicting of pain and torture.

On getting home, Musab carried her in a bridal style into the house. Her leg is still bandaged, so walking is going to be pretty hard he knew.

"Do you want me to get you anything?" He asks, after dropping her gently and laying her on the couch. He strokes her hair gently.

"An escape out of this hell maybe." She said with distaste.

"Fateemah, I know you're going through loads right now and I want you to know that I'm here for you. I'm always here for you whenever you need me. I'll make sure everything is okay again. Please I just want you to trust me."

"I don't want you to be there for me. I'm miserable for you. I'm not the right woman for you, can't you see? Everyone keeps saying that. Dad, mom, Raheem and even your friends!"

"I don't care what they all think. You're perfect for me. You're all I ever prayed for, all I ever wished for and all I ever wanted. I love you and I believe you love me too. We can get through this. Please.........." By now he's holding her hands, staring deep into her eyes and his voice sounds shaky. "Please let me be there for you. Let's heal and get through this together. Please."

"I can't be who you want me to be. I'm not the woman you wished for. I've changed Musab.I can't be that kind of person they want me to be."

"I know you and I know deep down you're a very good person. And you don't have to babe... This is us. I'll make sure you only do what makes you happy..... in a halal way."

"And what about the niqob?I am not ready for it. My career is on the line with it!" She asked and for a moment, he went mute.

"Fa.... Fateemah that order was from your dad and I don't think it's arguable. And inorder for me to convince him otherwise, career wise and academically, For the meantime, can you please chill and let me see what I can do but I don't think there's a way to avoid it totally whether now or in the future."