Morpheus - A Drv3 fic

'' Caerus ''

[01/07/20XX] 

Shuuichi stared at the wall. The day before, Himiko had invited Shuuichi to meet up with her and Tenko at 4pm. It was currently 1pm. Despite the fact it was 3 hours till he was to meet with them, Shuuichi did not feel like he could do anything in fear of being late for that event. So Instead he stared at the wall.

Shuuichi wouldn't lie and say he wasn't nervous to see Tenko and Himiko, he hasn't spoken to Tenko in awhile, but you know, she's... He hopes that maybe she was "messed with" a bit for game purposes.

Himiko did say Tenko wasn't against him coming, so maybe everything would be fine. 

Shuuichi stared at the clock in his room. It read 1:30pm. He sighed, contemplating opening a book he had grabbed the other day. This would be the fourth time he's tried to read it, but maybe if he tried again he'd be able to focus. Just maybe. 

His eyes scanned over the words on the page, not actually registering a single one. Heflipped the page, recognizing the shapes of some familiar words and names, but not full sentences. He tried to remember what was said on the previous page, but he couldn't. He closed the book again,putting the bookmark back where it was when he picked it up. 

The room around him was the same blank shades as the pages in the book. Even though he was out of the proper hospital rooms, everything was still that sterile white, only making the room feel more silent and suffocating. He stared out the window, The grass brown and the sky grey.  A typical winter day.

His eyes darted around the room, looking for something he could maybe distract himself with. Before everything happened, he wouldn't mind sitting and staring at a wall for 3 hours, but now every time he let his kind wander, it would end up at the killing game. And he didn't want to think about it more than necessary. 

The killing game has reshaped his entire life, even though they're free he still jolts awake at 10am expecting a monokuma announcement, he still feels afraid of going into certain facilities in the hospital past 10, even though they explicitly said it's alright. He doesn't know if he'll ever be able to function as he used to, the killing seems to never leave his thoughts, even at night... he dreams of being put back into it, or the hospital becoming another killing game, or even of him messing up a class trial and watching everyone's execution before his own. 

While he's not a fan of the stark white of the hospital, he's glad it's not a bright pink, or that it doesn't have any plants... he knows it's irrational, but he can't even stand seeing that colour now, or vines and moss... everything remind of it too easily, and he feels so stupid. It's not that big of a deal, it shouldn't bother him as much as it does. But it does. And he hates it. He wishes he could just erase it all from his memory, so that he never has to think about it again... sometimes he wishes that he died at the end of the game, that he would've rather it all been real and he would be dead than him feeling grief over living people. Him feeling broken over events that never happened. Hell probably never be the same, but in the end, nothing happened. How was he supposed to live like this? 

He glanced to the clock. 2:27pm. 

Maybe he should try reading that book again.

—---

Himiko sat quietly next to Tenko on the bench. The air was cold and crisp, stinging her nose as she breathed it in. She rubbed her mittened hand together, warming them. She had asked Tenko to meet her an hour earlier than Shuuichi, so that they could have some time to talk. She hadn't counted on it being so cold. 

"Are you cold himiko? We could go closer to share warmth!" Tenko suggested, smiling with her usual smile. It stung himiko a little, how could she still smile so brightly after what happened? She was glad she wasn't upset, but at the same time she couldn't help but feel a little bitter about it all. 

"I'm fine Tenko, thanks" Himiko said, maybe a bit colder than she intended. "I wanted to talk to you a bit today, uhm..." Tenko's eyes brightened when himiko started talking, turning her full attention to her. "Nyeh... I wanted to say that... I'm sorry I ignored you so much during... the game... you and Angie both mean a lot to me, and I should've treated you both equally..." 

Tenko certainly tried to hide the way her face dropped a little when himiko mentioned Angie, but she quickly recovered. "Thank you so much Himiko!! You know you don't have to apologize though!!" She waved her hands in front of her. "No, I do... I wasn't being fair to you, I didn't appreciate you until you died... I want to be better. And I want to be friends, better this time" Himiko affirmed. Tenko smiled widely "Really?! I want to be friends again too! You're the best Himiko!" Tenko went to hug her, but Himiko gently pushed her away. "First though, I wanna say... Nyeh, this is so tiring..." Himiko rubbed her eyes. "I don't like how pushy you are sometimes... it's really uncomfortable... If we're going to be friends, can you try to listen to me more?" 

Tenko paused for a minute. "I... sorry, I didn't realize I was making Himiko uncomfortable! Tenko will try her best to listen to you!" She said. Himiko smiled softly, she hoped this time her and Tenko could be great friends, with Angie too. 

—---