glow•° || skz || nonbinary Felix ff

working•°

I told the staff as soon as possible.

They weren't that surprised. They were all actually pretty chilled.

The kpop-industry is a whole lot gayer than it seems - the staff stopped to question things long ago (especially after working with us).

Our managers and label got a whiff of it too. Grapevine. They weren't as chilled, obviously. I mean, they can't even handle the bisexual thing (Minho's open gayness neither), so no one's surprised.

But as long as I keep my queerness off camera they can't really get to me.

So far, I was satisfied.

The members also did their best to accustom themselves to the new situation.

They tried to use my new pronouns as soon as there weren't any cameras around; gently correcting each other if one of them messed up.

Someone had the idea that everyone who got my pronouns wrong had to do ten push-ups. That was the best idea ever.

We just did push-ups all the time.

Me too, because I messed up as well, calling myself boy out of habit.

Chan predicted that by the end of the month we all would have a shoulder's width from over 60 cm.

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Changbin even bought a book on nonbinary and genderqueer issues. I sometimes borrow it from him to read a few chapters myself.

We always talk about the topics afterwards. He asks me for example if that's something I struggle with, too (dysphoria - yes, wanting a surgery - no; etc.) and how it feels for me.

Through that we grew closer. He showed that he's genuinely devoted and by now I can talk to him about everything.

He's my mental support.

It's freeing.

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Minho began to do my hair more often.

Whenever we were bored backstage or in the dorm he would come to me and start combing my hair.

He would put little bunches in it or try to braid some strands.

My favourite look so far was probably the one with my hair swept back and two braided strands left falling over my face.

He would sometimes even let me do his hair.

I wasn't as good at styling it as he was though.

I don't know what made him start this but it became somehow our little tradition.

It was so rare that he showed his affection this openly - I savoured every second like the treasure it was.

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Jisung strolled in my room the other day, going straight to my wardrobe to fish out all my crop tops.

'I wanna wear more crop tops on camera' He stated. Before I could say anything he added: 'And so do you.'

And this is how we spent three hours together infront a laptop shopping for the most wildly designed cropped shirts.

(Only a small part of those three hours were spent with binge watching skz thirst edits)

I couldn't wait for all that stuff to be delivered.

As soon as the others heard about it, they made us promise to stage a fashion show to show off all the new pieces.