The Memory Playlist

Otherside

Niki.

I bite my lip as I open my Twitter app. I was notified of Andy mentioning me in a Tweet.

"Happy Valentines Day to my love @xnikisikkx I miss you more everyday and I can't wait to see you at the end of this month <3"

I smile and reply with several heart emojis. Then I compose my own Tweet.

"Spending Valentines day without my love, but he's in my head and heart. I love and miss you to the moon and back <3 @andybvb" I attach a picture of us kissing, the first one we ever took together backstage. I then send my first text of the day to Andy.

"Andy, I love you so much. And I miss you a lot. And you're my favorite person in the world."

As I wait for a reply, I turn over in bed and look out at the skyline. I woke up earlier today, as I usually do, but at six in the morning the sun has just started to rise, and as I look out towards the balcony I smile at the orange glow. I grab my cigarettes and lighter and walk out.

I don't think there's anything better than mornings in Los Angeles. It's before the heat of the day comes, the view along the skyline is the most amazing thing, and smoking a cigarette makes it even better. There's already cars driving through the city and I can hear someone playing their music a little loudly in the neighborhood across from ours. This is my favorite city in the world.

I hear my phone ring from inside, so I walk back into the room. I've received a text from Andy.

"Baby Doll your tweet made my heart soar. I miss you so much."

I put my cigarette out and smile. I roll onto the bed to start texting him, which I waste my entire day doing.

My heart is racing as I sign into my Skype account on Andy's computer in the music room. Tonight is the first time Andy and I are Skyping because he's in a hotel room by himself and is going to take advantage of it. My fingernails tap against the glass table as I wait for it to log in.

My pulse skips a beat when I see his name already online. I instantly move my mouse over his name and press call. It rings in my earbuds once... twice... three times...

"Caught me early, baby," Andy says, holding his phone above his head. He has his headphones plugged in too. He looks at something other than the camera and ruffles his hair, and I see that he's shirtless. I'm at a loss for words as I take him in, as pictures from the stage and occasional selifes don't do him justice. At my silence, he looks back at the phone. He takes a deep breath in and says, "Baby Doll, you look fuckin' gorgeous tonight."

I feign casualty, pretending that I didn't spend what felt like hours on perfecting the wings of my eyeliner or picking what I should wear, which happened to be a regular pair of black skinnies and a graphic tank top that showed a decent amount of cleavage that would leave his mind to imagine more. "This is just what I was wearing earlier," I lie, knowing it's silly but silently appreciating the effort I put in.

"I don't think you understand what you do to me," Andy says as he walks out of presumably the bathroom. I watch as he walks to the bed and sets his phone down as he lays stomach down on the bed. He rests his phone against the pillows or the headboard, reaches over to the nightstand, moves his phone again, then pulls his hand back with cigarettes and his lighter. I watch as he lights one, and when he's finally done he leans against his arm, which is straight up and holding his cigarette. "Mm, let me look at you," he says, his voice gravelly. His eyes flicker over the entire screen, and he sighs. "Niki, baby, I miss you," he says, taking a drag.