Tanks princess

Chapter 6

Patiently waiting for Bryan to finish setting up the machine he brought with him that also has a little screen in there, was tough after eating the cookie that Tank gave me. I wanted to see for myself and confirm that my baby was there, and to know if they were okay. Fumbling with the blanket I looked up to the side and Tank was staring at me from the chair he was on, causing a weird and new nervous feeling to course through my body making me look away.

"Okay, sweetie, if you can just let me take the blanket off and move your shirt a little higher in your stomach area," Bryan said while taking hold of the handle that has a roller and is connected to the machine he was fixing. He looked at me expectantly, waiting on my answer, but the thought of someone else looking at my body, at me, scared me, my trauma was beyond mental but physical as well. The blanket gives me comfort, but they haven't done anything to harm me yet. I felt my head start to cloud over with mixed feelings and thoughts, all jumbled together, so I looked at Tank, he nodded his head and offered me his hand, and my pale, shaking hand took hold of it.

"If at any moment is too much, or you don't feel safe... Let me know and I'll take care of it" said Tank while distracting me with his thumb that was rubbing the top of my hand that was in his. His statement made me feel better about exposing that small area of skin, therefore, I turned to Doc and nodded my head for him to go ahead and continue.

Bryan's slow and steady hands moved the blanket first, looking at me in between movements to make sure I was still okay, when he got to my shirt which was quite a few sizes bigger than what it would be my size, I released a harsh breath and held Tank hand a little tighter in which he did the same thing, giving me a tiny squeeze. Bryan waited for a moment and then continued, putting the shirt just a little bit higher than my belly button.

"Can I fold your bottoms down a little to get access to the lower belly?" A tremor went through my body and some shaking started, a light whine-like sound came out of me as I closed my eyes and tried to keep my breathing pattern.

"Olivia, deep breaths, love. This is just so you can see and check on the baby" Tank said from beside me, still holding my hand, making me realize that I had a strong grip on it. I nodded my head, still with my eyes closed and trying to breathe deeply "We can stop if you're not comfortable and try another day when you're ready." No! I want to see it; I want to see them. I took another deep breath and opened my eyes, Doc was waiting beside the machine looking at me, I nodded again but now looked his way so he knew he could continue with his job.

"I will put this gel in your belly which might feel a little cold at first, and with this handle, I am going to move it around to get to see the babe, okay?" Doc explained after he folded it a little on my bottom and put a napkin on the border. I nodded and he went ahead. I couldn't see or understand what was going on that screen, so my hand was still gripping Tanks. "Alrighty, this little thing right here is your baby," he said while pointing at a little blob on the screen that was surrounded by a black background, in difference with the rest of the image that was grayer, my hand started shaking again and my eyes watered. I don't know if I am happy, sad, scared but more like a little of the three "Do you want to hear the heartbeat?" That was the last thing that would confirm their existence. I need this. I nodded again and after clicking on some button, I was able to start listening to the heartbeat and my eyes watered and my tears started flowing.

"Ar...Are they... Healthy?" My nerves were fried, my hands shaking, and everything seems scary, but I couldn't help myself from knowing if the fetus was healthy after everything that I went through.

"It seems to be doing well so far, I say you are between week six to eight. They seem to be formed a little bit more than a six-week embryo, but the size is a little smaller than what I would expect. Of course, with your situation, it could be expected, and I find it as a miracle that there is no other issue. Do you want me to print a picture?" He asked with a concerned face, automatically I nodded my head again. After he printed two pictures, he used the napkin he left in my bottom clothing to clean the remainder gel, to then start packing the machine.

"Can I?" Said Tank while pointing to fixing my shirt and blanket, I nodded while staring at the images Doc gave me. Too lost in my shock and slowly creeping anxiety to mind him doing so for me with the one hand that was free, his other one still holding mine.

"While you haven't told us what happened to you and we only have assumptions right now, I want you to know, sweetie, that you have options," Doc said, standing with all his stuff fixed and organized. I looked at the picture again. Options, I have options. I looked into Doc's eyes after Tank squeezed my hand again "Adoption is one, an abortion can still legally work because of how far along you are, but you can also keep it..." Doc got interrupted by Tank butting in.

"There is no rush in making decisions, and there is no rush of you leaving, we are more than happy to take care of you and the little babe if you desire to stay with us" The look in his eyes... the determination he had got me thinking that he meant what he said, even though this might be a handful process with many downs, probably more than ups.

"Where...am I?"

"You are in the Iron Crow MC compound; we are a group of men and women who like to ride their motorbikes and help the community with some other jobs. You are completely safe here as we are surrounded by a tall fence and none of us would hurt you." Tank said while still holding my hand and looking straight into my eyes. I could feel how serious he was about what he was saying, it is more like a promise. A promise to me that I am safe.

"I don't w...want to" Deep breath "be a burden," I said, more like, I whispered. Lowering my gaze to my other hand that now lay in my lap.

"You wouldn't be. I am inviting you to stay here" A squeeze in my hand tried to convince me of the honesty of those words. How can I trust them? "You don't have to decide now, I just want you to know that you are welcome here, during and after your recovery and we will be okay with your decisions for the future" His gaze moved to my lower belly. My baby.

He took so much from me, and he hurt me so badly, because of that I have this miracle baby, and even if it's a miracle, I am the one to decide if it is a good one or not. I don't know how long I was trapped, I just know the feeling of misery, of loneliness. If I keep my baby, am I going to be reminded of the bad things?

My will to escape came from the thought of what I now know is growing inside of me, but I'm scared, with no job, house, or family. Nothing. If I stay as Tank said, would it be the best for me? I don't know them but at the same time, they saved me and treated my wounds.

"Olivia" Tank said beside me, tightening his grip on my hand once again, making me realize that I got distracted in my head again causing my hands to start shaking once more "No rush, darling." He said then gave me a small smile.

I nod and take a deep breath.

Then again.

And again.

"I...I um" I looked into his eyes and he was paying attention to me, looking right back into my eyes " I think...I'll...s...stay"