Ivy's World (buckybarnesxOC)

(2) Hell's Kitchen

What is a dream? Scientifically, dreams are when the parts of our brain used for high order functions like speech and language are active while we sleep. Bore-ring. What is a dream not scientifically? A rendition of our subconscious thoughts throughout the day? A look into a different universe perhaps? We don't really know. Nightmares however, are a little more cut and dry, specifically when we're talking about nightmares stemming from trauma.

Trauma affects the brain greatly. One traumatic event can cause your brain to stay in a constant state of hypervigilance, heighten your emotional reactivity, even suppress your memories and impulse control. From one event. Can you imagine constant events every waking second for seventy years? I sure hope you can't. But it explains why James can't sleep, or should I say won't sleep.

Unfortunately, tonight was a night he could not fight it off. Maybe it was learning Ida's Corner still existed, pictures of his time and faces he could try to recognize were still there. He could keep up the Sunday morning tradition he had with his family. It might have been the prospect of new memories coming back to him the longer he sat there. Maybe it was the pretty waitress that talked to him like he was normal and not what he thought he was. A murderer, a freak.

James woke up on his floor, instantly shooting to stand before getting lightheaded and falling back to the side, using his right hand to catch his fall. His heart was pounding against his ribcage so aggressively he thought for a second that he might be having a heart attack and a little part of him buried in his brain was relieved.

After his blurred vision cleared and he could catch his breath he looked around his living room to show himself he wasn't in a Hydra facility. But he couldn't get the images out of his head. He stood quickly, letting the small blanket he had fall leaving him in sweatpants and no shirt. As he stalked to his kitchen to get a glass of water he caught a glimpse of himself in his bathroom mirror. He stared for a moment, not recognizing the person staring back. A few more seconds passed before he turned to the bedroom and threw a long sleeved shirt on.

The view of the city from his window was limited but the busy street and constantly lights was almost a comfort, something that grounded him for a few moments when he caught himself watching. With a calmer demeanor, he took a deep breath and sat on the edge of the bed he had never actually slept in.

As he sat there his mind spiraled a bit thinking of the next name on his list and devising a plan to make the amend, his nightmare, Steve, Sam, and then, possibly the most random one of all. One that made his his lips twitch upwards into a smile. Who is Gordon Ramsey?

School for Ivy that week was painfully exhausting, not because of the actual school work just really the people around her. Can you blame her? She really just missed her friends, it's like she was the only one out of all of them who got Blipped. They all continued on with their lives for five years and adapted; moved on. Here Ivy was still in college. It was even tough back then too. Already behind on life when she took her gap years, her class all graduated and she- well she was dealing with the loss of her brother. We'll swing back to that later. But it was just another time the world kept spinning without her.

Thankfully it was Thursday (she didn't have work or classes on Friday's so Thursday's were her Friday's) classes were finished and she was at work, late but at work.

"Hey sorry I'm late, I have no excuse but I am sorry." she said as she walked past MJ and Peter to hang her coat up. It didn't look terribly busy so at least MJ wasn't in the weeds.

"You're fired." MJ deadpanned.

"I'm shaking in my boots." Ivy joked, tying her apron on and grabbing some pens. "Did you guys get your MIT applications yet?"