LIFE AND DEATH (edythe's pov)

Chapter 13 another complication

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Solar Midnight: Midnight Sun Reimagined (Life and Death, Book I) by beyondthedawn

Books » Twilight Rated: T, English, Supernatural & Romance, Beau S., Edythe C., Words: 224k+, Favs: 59, Follows: 36, Published: Dec 26, 2020 15Chapter 13: ANOTHER COMPLICATION

I did not feel the usual guilt when I returned to Beau's room that night, though I knew I should. But it felt like the correct course of action-the only right thing to be doing. I was there to burn my throat as much as possible. I would train myself to ignore his scent. It could be accomplished. I would not allow this to be a difficulty between us.

Easier said than done. But I knew this helped. Practice. Embrace the pain, let that be the strongest reaction. Beat the element of desire entirely out of myself.

There was no peace in Beau's dreams. And no peace for me, watching him twitch restlessly and hearing him whisper my name over and over. The physical pull, that overwhelming chemistry from the darkened classroom, was even stronger here in his night-black bedroom. Though he was not aware of my presence, he seemed to feel it, too.

He woke himself more than once. The first time he did not open his eyes; he merely buried his head under his pillow and groaned. That was good luck for me-a second chance I didn't deserve, since I didn't put it to good use and leave as I should have. Instead, I sat on the floor in the farthest dark-shadowed corner of the room, and trusted that his human eyes would not spot me here.

He didn't catch me, even the time that he got up and stalked to the bathroom for a glass of water. He moved angrily, perhaps frustrated that sleep still evaded him.

I wished there was some action I could take, as before with the warm blanket from the cupboard. But I could only watch as I burned, useless to him. It was a relief when he finally sank into a dreamless unconsciousness.

I was in the trees when the sky lightened from black to gray. I held my breath-this time to keep the scent of his from escaping. I refused to let the pure morning air erase the ache in my throat.

I listened to breakfast with Charlie, struggling again to find the words in his thoughts. It was fascinating-I could guess at the reasons behind the words he said aloud, almost feel his intentions, but they never resolved into full sentences the way everyone else's thoughts did. I found myself wishing that his parents were still alive. It would be interesting to trace this genetic trait further back.

The combination of his inarticulate thoughts and his spoken words were enough for me to piece together his general mindset this morning. He was worried about Beau, physically and emotionally. He felt similarly concerned about the idea of Beau roaming Seattle alone as I would-only not quite so maniacally. Then again, his information was not as up-to-date as mine; he had no idea about the number of close calls he'd lived through recently.

He worded his reply to him very carefully, but it was only technically not a lie. He was obviously not planning to tell him about his change of plans. Or about me.

Charlie was also worried about the fact that he wasn't going to the dance on Saturday. Was he disappointed about this? Was he feeling rejected? Were the girls at school cruel to him? He felt helpless. He didn't look depressed, but he suspected that he would hide anything negative from him. He resolved to call his mother during the day and ask for advice.

At least, that was what I thought he was thinking. I might have misconstrued parts.

I retrieved my car while Charlie loaded his. As soon as he had driven around the corner, I pulled into the driveway to wait. I saw the curtain twitch in his window, then heard his stumbling footsteps race down the stairs.