dear diary. my name is spongebob. i really like dick.
today i saw ymy husband squiardward.
my uhsband is so hot. he ahs 6 tentacles. and yeah
today is my first day of college! im so ciexited :) i amjor in cooking and cleaning! in the wicse words of nicki minaj i do the cooking and i do the cleaning
oh crap!!!!! im late to schol
i trip andfall downt he stairs and take a minute to pray to thea mong us god, penis golfball
i wishfor academic success and lots of bussy, andthen i run all the way to school!!!
when i get to school, someone opens the door andsamcks me in my face and i die
i see god in ehaven and he tells me i must find a pattner or i will die. for realz.
i come abck to life and i smack the person os hard his head becomes an egglplant
i go to sit downa tm y seat
the teacher calls attentdance and comes ot my name
"SPONGEBOB THE FOURTH SQUID GAMES!!!!!!"
"HERE!!!!!!!!1" I YELL SO LOUD
the person inf ront of me dies
someone taps on my shoulder "h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-hhh-hh--h-h-hhuh?"
i turned around and see .him
squidussy
he has a six pack and big eyes, with among us pupols. he has a lot of drip and hes staring at right me!!!!!!!!!!!! actually. no
my boobs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i get so mad i stand up on the desk and i kick his face
his balls come off imedediately and he flies back so far he hits the wall and breaks throughans flies through several rooms before dying
he goest o see god, and god smacks him back to life
he gets up and brushes himself off before busting a move then walking back to me
he gives me one of his slimy tentacles and spoligizes "im sorry spiongie, i didnt mean toblook at ur boob" he blushes "i guess ur just so hrard not to look at holy fuck holy fucking fuck that bodiy of yours is absurdb"
i blush and look aaway. b-baka! i look away so fast my head spins and i get dizzy and i pass otu
i wake up in the hospital and "h-h-h-huh????" i look at my cielging and its squidussy!
this is jsut like the scene of evangelion!!!!!!
"s-ss-qduidsussy?? are you ok???? whatdiare you doing with your hand???? whats that on your hand????"
he looks down at me adn wipes his hand off on my head, "u-u-um nothing its just spunkbop. im so fucked up."
oh. maybe it sjust white gatorade :)
i closemy eyes and i slowly drift off to sleep. i dream of elon musk falling into a pitt and turning into a n eggplant
end of chapter one
coming up next on dragon ball z: the adventures of squid games fall guys
see you in 365 days. or will we