Mountain of The Moons • Book 1

Chapter 25

"You know Minoru has been looking for you for the last hour right?" Jun said appearing behind me out of the long silence.

"Yeah he's made about three laps around the Temple." I said looking to Jun who was walking up the stairs to the guards tower I was perched up in. "I wondered what he was doing."

The last few days were a lot different than what I was used to. Things felt better because we could all walk around without fear, but I still found myself wanting to hide. I didn't like being alone with my thoughts, but I couldn't stay in the infirmary all day with Jun. He was due to be released soon so I was thankful for that much. He had only left a handful of times for short trips because he got winded fairly easily.

"What are you doing up here in the first place?" He asked me with his hands on his hips.

"Fresh air I guess." I said with a shrug. "That and I couldn't stomach Gia poking and prodding inside of your guts."

"You going to give someone a heart attack just sitting on the edge like that." He said walking up the rest of the stairs. "That someone being me."

"I'm fine, I just feel weird around the others." I said in a low voice as he came up at my side.

"Why's that?" He asked as he got closer. "I thought you didn't want to be alone."

"I think everyone knows who I am now. Not to mention everyone associated me with Yami." I said in a hushed tone. Initially it was just the Elites who knew about me, but after what happened everyone had just about found out. "I'm the enemy no matter which way you look at it. Alone up here is better than with them down there, even if they don't hate me I feel guilty."

"No one blames you." He said knowing where my mind was going.

"Sure but that doesn't stop me from looking being looked at like I'm a freak." I said shaking my head.

"Makio come on." He said not liking what I was saying but that was fine. He didn't have to like it for it to be true.

"It's true. I was dumb enough to get played by the enemy. I was an idiot for not noticing sooner." I said shaking my head. "Not to mention I already came from the person who sent him out to kill their classmates. There's no way I look like the good guy in any of this."

"Stop talking like that, I mean it. He had us all fooled." He said harshly.

"I thought I loved him Jun." I said bringing my legs into my chest. "I actually had feelings for him. It was all a lie. I almost actually admitted that I loved him- I mean I think I did, I shouldn't have- the point is I felt something I shouldn't have for him."

"I won't pretend like I understand, but with the Wisteria those feelings may not have been yours to chose. You may have been preconditioned to love him." Jun said gently.

"That's the thing. I feel like that was a choice I made myself. It's been a week since I last was injected with Wisteria because he avoided me for that long and I still feel guilty because part of me still has those feelings. Part of me feels like it was a nightmare and he isn't some monster. He's still the Yami that I know." I said heavily.

"It hurts to be in love someone you shouldn't." Jun said and I looked to him with confusion.

"You have some secret girlfriend you haven't told me about?" I asked him as he rested his elbows on the ledge next to me. "Siena?"

"Oh no, not Siena. This was a long time ago." He said with a soft smile that soon faded.

"Oh come on, you can't just say that and then not tell me more." I said laughing a little.