𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒

CHAPTER THIRTY ONE

BELLAROSA'S POV

Did she think of me as a monster?

of course i am , i'm a monster

a failure

a mistake that needs to disappear

i'm a killer , that's what i truly am

a cold blooded killer because i was raised to be one , it's all i've known , that's what was imprinted in my brain for all my life

i'm a monster , a failure , a mistake

all that i'm useful for is killing nothing more

...right...?

shaking away my thoughts , i shoved my hands in my pockets. i decided to walk back to the hotel

i can't face at genevieve after what i did , and worse she saw it first hand

a heartless monster that deserves nothing good in their life

walking up to my hotel room i immediately packed my bags , i need to leave i can't stay here anymore . i called an available jet

after a few minutes i went to the bathroom , turning on the shower i turned to the mirror looking at myself

you make me sick i wish you were never born , you are useless i really hoped your mother aborted you . such a disgrace to my empire

those words never left my mind ever since my father told me that on my 14th birthday , i don't think i ever felt that much pain since that exact day . i remembered crying the same night in my room so hard i passed out 

and that night was the last time i ever felt any emotion , i think

i kinda shut down since then , i always wondered was this how parents should treat their children?

than i witnessed how other parents in the outside world and how luna's parents treated their kids , they seemed so loved and happy

why haven't i gotten that?
am i not good enough
am i really a useless mistake that should've been killed in my mother's womb?

sighing deeply i stripped my blooded clothes stepping into the shower , maybe that'll wash away my numbness

——————

as the jet landed , i immediately got into my car driving off

arriving at the penthouse , i got out with my suitcases in hold walking in locking the door behind me

my phone rang , slipping it out of my pocket . low and behold it was my dearest father

"what?" i answered already annoyed

"the deal is ending in a week , you and genevieve should've made up your minds already" i rolled my eyes , i completely forgot about that whole thing

"mhm yeah...is that all?" i'm tired and need my bed

"i heard about the little shit show that happened in vegas , not only did you fuck it up like you always do i have to pay for the goddamn damages and worse i have fucking people calling and emailing me about how my psycho daughter is on the loose and needs to be tamed" he yelled over the phone

"they said something i didn't like and i dealt with it " i shrugged , but that seemed to make him angrier

"i did not raise you to become this sloppy , i intrusted you with this and now see i have to clean up after you're useless way of not handling it in a different way . this is why you are not fit for taking over my empire you will bring it down and i will not let your useless actions ruin my reputation , so work on your fucking anger-"

"fuck you" i spat cutting him off as i hung up

how dare he . he didn't even fucking raise me the useless piece of scum

and saying i'm useless when he could've done that shit himself is beyond me

i fucking hate him

i hate my mother

i hate that stupid empire

i threw my phone against the wall

walking to the kitchen , i grabbed a bottle of vodka heading up to my room

drinking away my problems will always help . i don't care if I die from doing it

it's not like someone cares anyway