Nothing's f---ing wrong!

Chapter 1 :)

I get up washing my face and looking at the mirror...
"I guess all my friends I told to live with me when we get older weren't going to live with me after all huh?"
I remind myself

I grab my phone already about to burst into tears and look at tiktok scrolling for a bit
"Oh one of my friends posted on tiktok let's see what's thats about"
I tell myself trying to feel better

In the tiktok it was my friend lucy and my ex girlfriend Anny living in a house together getting unpacked to music

I close tiktok and wash my face again taking a deep breath..
"I hate them sometimes.."
I laugh at myself as that thought comes to mine

I leave the bathroom

My apartment was small my sister hated me at the moment so she left and my friends...well they don't wanna live in a house with me, they rather live in a house with other people than me even though I thought of it first!
But its fine

I go to my closet and look for something comfortable I mean who doesn't wanna get comfortable?
I love getting comfortable even if where I'm going is supposed to help me get out of my comfort zone..
Who cares!

Finally I pick out some black big baggy Comfortable pants and a white tank top saying the words km standing for "kill me" but no one would know or care if they did know, not like they ever did.

I grab a bookbag and a water bottle locking the door and going to my therapist

Knock knock

I hear a come in and walk inside peeking my head in
"Hey..."

"Hello miss. Jones! I'm glad you could make it!"
She said so happily but I could tell how fake it was it sounded like one of those girls who are so fake to you in school saying "oh I Loooove you hair" we all know you don't just say you don't like it and stop looking for something to laugh at.

"Hello."
I say quickly, shutting the door and sitting down fidgeting with my rings that I had on my finger

"Its been a while! Well I just wanted to see how you have been! Just tell me everything that has been on your mind!!"
She sounded so happy to hear about my life it didn't sound like she had one her own

"Uh well I'm starting to feel jealous again.."

"Jealous!? Why!? Your so pretty-"

"Could you just stop. be real with me and shut up, I hate it when you sound like that! It makes me feel like your just one of those ugly ass girls at school who don't even have a life!"
I told her just trying to stop that ignoring voice

"And if you wanna know why I'm jealous its because well... My friends we had been friends sense like 6th grade and now I don't even think they want me as one anymore..."

"Oh.. Why is that?"

"Its because I broke up with my ex"

"And why did you break up with her?"

I looked at her questioning if I should even tell her anything else taking a deep breath I look down and keep talking

"I didn't love her..."

"You didn't love her? No.. I know you, you wouldn't-"

"You don't know me, I'm just someone who goes to you because I almost committed, nothing else"

She sighed and took some notes, I hate it when they write things down, like what are they writing!? What is it about!- well me of course but what about me!?

I looked at her annoyed

"My bestfriend Lucy rather live with my other friends that she " don't like" than someone that she actually like be
cause they said they were going to fucking kill themselves, Like good for them! They CAN go die I rather not hear their fucking voices ever again!!"

The therapist just kept taking notes every word I said her note writing would go faster and faster

"She always forgets me!! Always!! She postes about my use to be girlfriend when we were together! She acted like I was the bad boyfriend because I didn't know her last name like Anny never fucking told her birthday!! I bet ten dollars she didn't know my birthday either! She never told me but apparently both of you have each others birthdays on each others phone they are EXS to remind you!! They act like they are still fucking together I hate it so much if you wanna date someone FUCKING DATE EM NO ONE IS STOPPING YOU!!"

The therapist puts her pen down and looks at me I'm still muttering to myself of all the things I hate and stuff

"Then tell them how you feel"

I looked at her with the blankes look
"Tell them now? Never. They have already heard all I have to say to THEM
Plus they are to busy doing god knows what together alone"
I roll my eyes thinking about it all and cover my eyes crying

The therapist looked away and sighed
"Well than tell me what this Anny girl did to you"

I take a deep breath and look at the therapist

"Ok but can I have some water..?"