The Hidden Box

Do you Remember?

Matt looked like I had punched him in the face. I instantly felt guilty of saying what I did. But words once spoken could not be taken back. "I don't know how I could convince you that I love you and would never hurt you", he tried to speak as calmly as he could, "I know you want answers but in order to get that, you need to learn the cause of your amnesia. Please Sarah! Something is better than nothing". His repeated requests for me to go see a doctor along with his inability to give me clear answers made me give in. "Okay", I replied, "Let's go see someone".

At this, Matt's face brightened up. "Thank you", he said sincerity gleaming in his eyes. "Now, how about you take some rest while I go make you some breakfast". He went to the kitchen but frowned up on opening the fridge, "Looks like we haven't got much here". He removed a few slices of cheese after searching the fridge a bit and removed some bread from a basket. I just stared at him. He had to know more. He definitely knew more.

He had dark eyes and slightly long hair that just needed a bit of trimming. His body was well built and I could easily make out his biceps. He was not entirely muscular but at the same time, not entirely lean. But I didn't feel any sort of affection towards him. Shouldn't I have felt something if we were a couple before? And still are....at least in his eyes.

The fact that he was trying to hide things from me was almost visible. "Matt, umm...when was the last time you came to this place?" I asked, curious to see his response.

"I came here yesterday morning. You used to be so thrilled when I would come home from work." he said wistfully. "Why are you asking though?"

I paused for a second, trying to come up with some excuse. "No reason, just trying to remember stuff", I shrugged. I wanted to clear all my doubts so that I could trust him fully, if nothing I knew he would positively help me.

"Here's your toasted cheese sandwich", he beamed as he handed over the plate. I noticed that he didn't make anything for himself to eat. Instead, he just sat next to me and watched me as I ate. His eyes were saying something that his mouth didn't. There was some unspoken emotion in them. Guilt? Admiration? Love? I wasn't quite sure. "Aren't you going to eat?" I asked him, starting to feel uncomfortable under his gaze. "Nah, not hungry", he smiled. Tiny, subtle movements of his showed that he wanted to be more closer to me than he already was.

Eating as fast as I could to get off from under his constant stare, I quickly shoved the last bite into my mouth and stood up. "Let's go to the doctor now", I felt very restless and tried to avoid him coming near me. Something about him did not feel right. "Thanks for the sandwich", I said as he stood up and quickly moved back, hoping to be subtle. "No problem, are you sure you don't want to take any rest?", Matt asked. I smiled nervously,"Positive".

On the way to the clinic we didn't utter a word to each other. Matt tried to talk but didn't seem to know what to say and quickly became quiet every time he tried to speak. We passed parks and a highway. Everything felt so different. I closed my eyes for a few moments, hoping that it would reduce the tension between us. Suddenly, after what seemed like a few seconds, someone was shaking me. Startled, I woke up.

"We reached the clinic, you can come and sit inside" Matt said. When we went in, he indicated the chairs and told me to sit down while he stood in line to book the appointment. After picking the top magazine from a rack, I sat down. There was a blond girl on the cover, who looked like she was made of porcelain. Upon glancing around I saw a clock. It was 11 a.m. I tried shutting my eyes and recalling something. Anything. Nothing came in my mind except a blank. There was only a hazy white picture in my head. As if it was a white canvas that had never been touched, except by confusion probably.

Matt came to me after a couple of minutes. "A lot of people have come today, so its gonna be a while before our turn", he informed me. "It's okay, I want to meet the doctor. It doesn't matter if I need to wait", I assured him.

"You know what? Maybe if you tell me how we met and other things, I could remember something", I suggested, hoping that this time my try would bear more fruit than the last time.

Matt laughed and I got filled with hope, he seemed willing to at least tell me something. "You were in your last year when you came for a summer internship to the company I worked in. You were so bubbly and fun to be with. Where ever you went you would without doubt light up the whole room. I remember the first time you missed work, and I just couldn't focus on my job and I just knew I had to have you in my life. You were like coming up for fresh air. Funnily until that time I used to just observe you from a distance. But once I realized what I felt for you, I started making an effort to chat with you at least twice a day. We started hanging out and went together on group events to both your university and my office functions. Around a month and a half passed like that, it wouldn't be long until your internship ended, so I decided it was the right time to ask you on a date".

Upon saying the last sentence Matt started laughing,"It was hilarious. I had booked reservations at a fancy hotel. It was a Friday and for some reason I just didn't know how to ask you out. So, I walked up to you during lunch to ask you". He stopped for a while to take a breath and then continued, "When we were alone I tried asking you but you seemed so nervous about something and the both of us kept interrupting each other when I realized you were trying to ask me out too!"

"It turned out that you had planned for us to watch an outdoor movie and had even brought the ingredients for our outdoor-picnic-dinner together. We ended up compromising by going to the restaurant after watching the movie. When we were near your house as I was dropping you home by my car, you just made me stop there in the middle of the road and insisted that we walk the rest of the way. Your house was nearby and you felt it would be romantic to walk in the dark like that. It was a beautiful starry night"

"Soon, we were inseparable. More than once though, I would find you hiding in a corner...crying. I tried asking you about it but you would change the subject every time. One day, becoming very upset finding you yet another time crying alone, I just carried you in my arms". As he said this he held my hand, "Meeting you was the best thing that ever has happened to me Sarah. I love you and I will always be there for you. What happened last night was my fault. I knew you were in danger...." Matt suddenly quietened as if he had said too much already.