Rick's Death

Rick's Death Chpter 1

Taking things as easy as he can with work after coming back nearly 2 years, Rick was about to take a break while he had a chance before preparing to go back to surgery for the first time in months though still Rick was unsure about rather or not he was ready to be back but shot down the thought because the moment he thought about turning the patient to Monica he could swear that Lesley was right there telling him to get through it because she was gonna be right there as she's always been.

" Rick? May I join you or would you prefer to be alone?" Gail asked

" No it's alright Gail.... Actually I think I could use alittle company.... I've kind of been having a hard time with getting through the last few weeks." Rick admitted

" It's understandable Rick given with what you've had to go through these last 2 years.... Trying to keep a kind of normalcy for the kids and then trying to work through trying to process everything you've had to face.. Lesley was a very special person to you and to have to face with what she went through becoming so sick it isn't easy for you..." Gail replied gently

" I miss her so much, Gail.... We had so many things we wanted to do, so many ideas we had to take the kids... She wanted to take the girls and Riley up to the cabin in the mountains where I've taken her before after the accident when Laura was killed. I took her out to the Aspen mountains in Colorado after she was better enough to be able to travel.... Everytime I would take her out there she was always so happy... always ready to have an adventure and then she had gotten so sick that she couldn't even get through taking a shower by herself without having to struggle... I wanted to take her up there for her birthday like I did a couple times before but she wasn't strong enough to be going out there and it didn't matter anyway because she didn't get to see her birthday..." Rick started venting

" How are the kids with all of this..." Gail asked gently.

" Jesslyn is having a harder time with tryin' to understand why this happened and Genesis she doesn't understand why I spend alot of my time just sitting in the living-room holding Lesley's urn or she would see me talking to a picture before I would go up at night and make sure they're tucked in... And Riley, he wonders where his mother is but knows she will never come home again.. It just hurts and it kills me Gail that I have no idea what to say to any of them about any of this..." Rick got out

" I can't imagine how you feel or how you have been trying to get through all of this... And then having to try to assure the kids and talk to them about all of this.." Gail said

" Gail I'm sorry that I've been unloading on you... I shouldn't be doing that.." Rick looked over 

" Hey I'm always gonna be here when you need a listening ear.... It's what I'm here for Rick so don't apologize for getting your feelings out. Lesley would want that for you she would want you to turn to your friends when you need to…. In fact a couple days before she passed and Lee and I were there, she asked me to be there when you need anything." Gail pulled Rick into a hug

" I was gonna tell Monica to take surgery this afternoon... But I soon said to myself that I could see Lesley now staring at me with that look of ' don't you dare' she always hated when I would do that." Rick replied with a small grin.

" Lesley always talked alot about you while she came in anytime she felt like she needed to talk or have a session. You drove her crazy but she said that she wouldn't have wanted to be with anyone else other than where she was with you." Gail stated 

" She really made me out to be a better man...and I told her that, I told her I became a better man because I had the opportunity to not only marry her once but I had the pleasure of doing it twice. The biggest regret I ever made in the first place was how much I once hurt her when I involved myself again with Monica, sure I worked my tail to the bone to make it up to her and she had forgiven me but…. I almost have started to feel that I didn’t deserve for her to do that, like I should’ve had to do more to make up for just how much I had hurt her at that time.”