[ UNEDITED ]
"Do you seriously think that low of me? Do you think I would do that to you after everything I told you? after all that we went through?... You never trusted me did you?"
He pressed his lips together in a thin line, "Don't turn this on...
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"Okay, you've been glaring for the last two hours, what's up?"
"What the hell were you two thinking dragging Finn into my room to talk to me?"
I spent a good three hours moping around yesterday after Finn left then another two being bitter with Kai and Avel for the ridiculous idea and plan to drag my ex who hates me over to talk to me about the very thing that put her in a crappy situation.
She already hates me.
I didn't want her to end up hating me more than she already does. It was a shitty feeling now that she didn't have a single shred of emotions for me but annoyance and anger. I mean I would too.
But like she said, it takes a while to get over real feelings and I know deep down she meant that she had some feelings for me left in her and I wasn't going to let that fade away.
I didn't want it to.
I don't deserve her nor does this family to have her a part of it, but I want her so goddamn bad that it hurts now. It all just fucking hurts.
Seeing her laughing and sharing jokes with everyone in class this morning when I walked in. Seeing her smiling at people the way she smiled at me.
It reminded me of the first day when I walked in and saw her. The way she turned to look at me with disgust and annoyance. It all happened again today. It made me feel a way that I haven't felt in such a long time.
It was...like seeing her for the first time again.
She was still so damn beautiful and breathtaking.
Her smile brightened up every fucking room she was in despite what the weather was. She was everything a person could dream of and more.
Ever since we broke up she was getting more male attention and I wasn't pleased, to say the least when half the guys in our class were flocking around her like desperate seagulls from that damn fish movie
I get it. I do. Who wouldn't have their attention on her? She had everyone's eyes set on her and she didn't even know it. She didn't even see it, and everyone was fawning over her but again who wouldn't?
She was sweet and caring.
She was smart and understanding, and so fucking supportive of everything no matter how ridiculous it sounded even after explanations.
She was funny and overall, a good person to be around and have in your life. She was the very definition of the girl you would take home to meet your mother. It was a shame I didn't have the chance to introduce her to Madison before we broke up.
She would have loved her.
Love was a terrifying thing. I never felt or received it. Not in the ways, I got it from Finn, or I hope it was love and I wasn't misreading the damn signs of her feelings.
