𝕷𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖔𝖋 𝕱𝖎𝖗𝖊 ( house of the dragon )

aemon v

Aemon waited in the abandoned room for Alicent to arrive. They had been meeting there, away from the eyes of the court. She was late, and he worried she wouldn't come. Just as he was about to give up, she appeared. Gods, he thought, she looks beautiful. Her hair was pinned up, and the dress she wore looked perfect on her. She carried a large book, holding it as if it were the most precious item she had ever possessed.

"Hi..." he said softly, unsure of what to say. He didn't want to mention her lateness as she already seemed dejected.

"Hello," her soft voice met his ears like music as she shut the door. He smiled at her as she sat on the floor with him. He had taken the time to clean up all of the things he'd broken days before, so the room wasn't a hazard.

"What's that?" he asked, motioning to the large book in her lap.

"Um..." She paused for a moment, looking down and running her hands over the cover. "It's a book about the histories of Westeros."

"Ahh, my cousin would enjoy that," Aemon said lightly with a small chuckle.

Alicent managed a faint smile. "Yes... I suppose he would."

A moment of silence followed as Aemon reached forward. He took Alicent's hand from the cover of the book and scooted closer to her, their knees practically touching. "How was your meeting with your father?"

"I do not wish to speak of my father," she said quickly and harshly. Aemon nodded, letting silence envelop them once more, but he still held her hand. "I'm sorry; I should be asking how you feel."

"Honestly, I do not wish to talk about that. I think I've been feeling all day. I'm honestly sick of feeling." He laughed a bit, focusing on her hand. His thumb caressed the back of it, and he smiled slightly.

She seemed to notice. "Why are you smiling?"

"Your hand is soft."

"Is it?"

"Yes, you have lovely hands." He cursed himself internally as the line slipped out. He felt foolish, but Alicent didn't laugh or mock him. She merely smiled.

"Thank you." Her voice remained as quiet as a mouse, and he dared not mention the dried blood around the tips of her fingers. He had seen her bite her fingers, and it broke his heart that this was how she coped with her worry.

"Are you okay?" he asked, trying to find her eyes as she looked at the aging book in her lap.

She nodded, swallowing hard. "I'm just scared..." Aemon was confused. If she was scared, he would do anything to make her feel safe. She could probably sense his confusion as she rushed to explain, "For Rhaenyra. She's really struggling with the loss of her mother."

"Are you sure that's what's bothering you?" Aemon held both of her hands gently. "You can tell me."

"Yes." She placed her hand on his face gently as she smiled. Aemon could still see that she was lying but decided against pressing further.

They sat in silence again, Aemon's thoughts swirling as he tried to find something to say. "Aemon..." Alicent interrupted his thoughts. He looked up to meet her eyes as she looked into his. Her eyes were soft and kind. "I..." Aemon had been trying to discern what she was about to say. "I seem to have developed some type of..." His concern deepened. Had she developed an illness? His thoughts raced. "I know that sometimes my duty to my family requires me to make sacrifices." Now he was even more confused. What was she talking about? "It is quite hard to do so sometimes, as personal feelings get in the way." She looked back at him from her gaze on the floor.

His face clearly showed his confusion, and she quickly removed her hands from his. Alicent returned to picking at her nails. He took her hands again, meeting her eyes. "What are you saying, Alicent?"

"I'm saying that sometimes..." She paused again. "People can harbor feelings for someone they do not necessarily wish to harbor feelings for." He raised his eyebrows at her vague statement. "Um... the minstrels sing songs of..." She swallowed again, and Aemon couldn't understand how minstrels suddenly entered the conversation. "They sing of caring for someone beyond your own will." She looked at him, probably hoping he understood, but he definitely did not.

"I'm sorry, I'm really confused."

She took a deep breath. "Some people... believe that having feelings for someone can be involuntary, and I feel that I have developed those feelings for you, Aemon."

He took a moment to process her statement. His eyebrows knit together as he tried to make sense of her words. Duty to her family, sacrifices, personal feelings... he was starting to understand her. Minstrels' songs, caring beyond will, feelings toward someone.

Possibly he took too long to process, as she pulled away. "I'm sorry; I've overstepped."

"No," Aemon said, moving his hands to hold her face. "You haven't overstepped." He smiled at her as she released a long-held breath. "Perhaps," he said with a breathy laugh, "someone might reciprocate those feelings in return."

They looked at each other and smiled. Aemon's hands still held Alicent's face as she placed her own hands on his forearms. They moved forward, their foreheads meeting. They closed their eyes, savoring the moment—just the two of them, together. No duty, honor, or fathers to interrupt.

"It's getting late," Alicent said softly.

Aemon nodded, his head still resting on her. They were both desperately trying to control themselves. He didn't want to dishonor her, so he wouldn't. She was beautiful and perfect in his eyes, and anyone who made her feel less than that would meet his wrath.

Before they parted, Aemon moved forward and placed a soft kiss on Alicent's lips. Her lips were as soft as they appeared, and he wished he could stay in that room forever. As they parted, Alicent smiled at him. He stood and offered his hand, and they held hands as they made their way to the door. Alicent left first, and Aemon leaned against the door, daydreaming only of her.