Promise [Number 5 X Reader]

- Arrivals and Rivals -

"Okay," you spoke loudly as you clasped your hands together. Your little group had moved upstairs to the billiards level of the lobby to hide from prying ears. "Time-Travel for Dummies, probably the most important piece of information you people will ever learn: The Grandfather Paradox. Let's say your grandfather makes your life miserable, so you go back in time to kill him when your grandfather was just getting into his 20's. Sure, you succeeded in killing him, but you went back too far and your mother was never born. Because one of your parents was never born, you were never born, making it impossible for you to have gone back in time to kill him in the first place, effectively breaking the universe as we know it." You took a breath, "Of course, in this particular instance, it could easily be called the 'Mother Paradox,' but it ultimately has the same repercussions."

Five agreed with a simple nod of his head, but the others seemed rather stunned by your sudden word vomit. Klaus was the first to open his mouth, "As grateful as I am that you made that as understandable as humanly possible, how do you know all of that? I thought this was kinda Five's area of expertise."

You shrugged, "I couldn't read non-fiction all the time."

Stan is using a pool stick as a staff in the back. "I'm so confused," sighed Diego.

"What a shocker," Allison mocked.

"I feel like the term itself is pretty self-explanatory," you grumbled, "Grandfather . . . Paradox . . . Grandfather-caused-paradox . . . Where am I losing you?" 

Viktor tried to further break it down, "Well, our mothers died before we were born, so we shouldn't even be here . . . But we are, and it's currently breaking the universe so it's causing a lot of problems."

"Big problems," Five added, sipping on the coffee he'd grabbed on his way up.

Stanley suddenly did a jump kick, letting out a loud, enthusiastic exclamation.

Diego sternly yelled, "Hey, Karate Kid! Sit still for five minutes, okay?" 

Stanley was quick to retort, "Mom told me I need to practice, so that's what I'm doing!" 

"Well, she's right about one thing," he replied quieter. "Your karate's shit." 

"Hey! I saved your pathetic ass!" You watched the exchange like it was a Ping-Pong match, and it was ten times as entertaining.

Allison spoke with a little more feeling this time around, "Wait a second. Five, you're the resident time-traveling expert. What does it mean that we caused a—a paradox?" 

" . . . Ehhh," answered the brunette. You knew it was bad when he couldn't articulate things verbally. "Paradoxes like this one have been purely theoretical up until now . . . Have there been any weird disappearances?"

"Such as?" inquired Viktor. 

"Right now? Uh, lobsters." 

Klaus shot up from his spot laying on the floor into a sitting position, "And, a shit-ton of cows!"

"I think Mr. Pennycrumb's gone, too," you noted. 

"I've got a feeling that these disappearances are just the beginning of our issues," Five sighed. 

"A feeling?" Allison quipped, "What happened to you retiring?" 

"Believe me, there's nothing I want more," Five groaned.

She was slowly getting more angry, "Five, you can't keep dragging us through Hell because you have an itch only an apocalypse can scratch and then expect us to deal with the fallout. You're not in any position to be giving marching orders."