Who is David Jeremiah Jones?

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C/W: Transphobia, mentions of homophobia, mentions of abuse including child abuse, alcohol mentions, death mentions, divorce mentions, sex mentions. Mentions of puberty and the discomfort felt seeing as the subject is trans.

Also, this takes place over many years, starting when the subject is 9. The next entry is when the subject is 12. 9-year-old subject is crap at spelling. 12-year-old is much better, so the dodgy spelling is only for a short while. It's OK... The bad spelling hurt to type. ;-;

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1989

Dear Diary! I am still 9. And I have a cool story to keep for when I'm a big –(1992 me says BOY!!! A BIG BOY!!! I get it now!!!).

Who is David Jeremiah Jones?

An old lady (1999 me... She isn't that old, actually.) asked me that. She looked older than mommy and daddy because her hair was all white. Her voice was funny and made me laugh. She said she was just french. I don't know what french is. I will ask mommy! She knows lots of things. Daddy will just shout if I ask him becos he is busy being a detectif.

I dont know who David Jeremiah Jones is. Maybe he is family because befour mommy and daddy got married her last name was Jones like Granny and Grandpa Jones! I think the old lady looked a little sad when I said I didnt know David but then she smiled at me said

OK. Maybe I will find him sumday. I heard he lives around here. I mite be too early.

The old lady is called Valentine, like Valentines Day! I told her my name which is – (1994 me here... I'm not writing down my dead birth name! It's a girl's name, and I know I'm not one. I've got a new name, but let's wait for 1994, huh?) (1999 me here. My name's even better. It only took me a DECADE to get it...) – and she said it was a pretie name but didnt soot me. I don't wanna be pretie! I wanna be cool and awesome and play football like Adam. But daddy says football is for boys and not girls. I just have to watch. I don't think Adam likes playing football. I know he likes music A LOT. Like house music which isnt made in houses. I dont know why they call it that!

Daddy says that making music is for babies and wimps. I dont get it. Lots of men make music and they arnt babies or wimps. Daddy is silly but I can't tell him or I will be in big trubble.

Valentine told me that boys and girls and anyone can do whatever they want if it isn't ileegal. It was hard to hear her words because her voice was weird and french! She told me too look for David Jeremiah Jones one day. Next time I see Grandpa Jones I will ask him. Or maybe David is from another Jones family. There are other Jones familys in Grimsburuh. I havent seen them but I know there ar becos mommy was born here.

Valentine went home but told me she fought I was a nice kid. I fought she was a nice old lady. She laughed. I don't get it. Is she not old? I fought she was 60 or sumfing. She doesnt have LOOOOAAAAADS of wrinkles like my Grannies and Grandpas, but her hair is all white. But maybe she is like Granny Jones! She said she got gray hair when she was 40 and it was all white by 55. Maybe Valentine is only in her 50s. It's still old but not SUPER OLD like Granny Jones because she is 65. I wonder if I will go gray early when I am an old –(1992 me, I am a MAN!!! ...And I hope I won't go gray early!!!).

Now I gotta go. Mommy is making donuts becos Adams's team won! Yum, donuts!! Go Little Grim Bagers!

Love S– (1992 me again!!! I'm not a girl but I don't know what I want my name to be. If David Jeremiah Jones isn't taken by anyone in the family, I might take that one!!! Now I gotta go, Mom's making donuts. Mmmmm, donuts!!!)

– – –

1992

Dear um, Journal? I think I'll go with that. I'm 12 now. I've changed a lot in 3 years.

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