The Song of Patroclus

Chapter 8

For the first time in my life, the soles of my feet burned.

The sun is high, and if I was back in Phthia, it would be breakfast by now. But I am no longer in Phthia.

The exhaustion of my legs is the last thing on my mind.

The first is Patroclus.

The first is always Patroclus.

The last thing I saw of my home was the serene sight of Patroclus sleeping.

The urge to wake him was strong. I wanted to tell him that I did not want to leave him, that the kiss tasted better than nectar, that I wanted to worship his lips for the rest of my living days.

Unfortunately, I didn't have it in me. I simply exhaled and left the room, and Patroclus, behind.

The more I think of it, the more I regret leaving. I should have stayed, I should have told mother I will not leave, that she cannot make me. It would have upset her, but at least I would still be in Phthia.

I consider turning around and going back, but I realize that if I went back now, my mother would drag me back to the mountain by my hair.

I stop to take a rest. That is when the reality of the situation catches up with me. I will stay on a lonely mountain indefinitely, leaving my life behind.

The thought makes me shudder. Inevitably, my mind wonders back to Patroclus. Somehow, I am not as devastated as I should be. I cannot see him for the gods know how long, and yet I am not that worried.

Why? Because I realized that I was expecting him to come after me.

And he would.

He will never let me leave the way I did. He would never let me leave alone at all.

I would do the same.

The thought excites me, but I am worried to have to explain to Chiron when Patroclus comes running up the mountain, red and out of breath. However, my biggest concern is my mother. She definitely has talked to, or rather threatened, him to leave me. But I know it, deep inside, that he will not listen. He will never listen.

She will get angry when she finds out. She will threaten to kill him and she will yell, black eyes swelling with fury.

The thought scares me, so I decided to stay and wait for Patroclus. I will not reach the mountain until I unite with him again.

—

It does not take him long. I hear the deep breathing but much rather, I hear his feet hitting the ground.

I recognize it, and so I stand up. My food crawls up my throat in nervousness, even thought I had only left him this morning.

How could I ever have thought I could do this without him?

A leaf under my foot gives away my position. I raise my head and see him looking around frantically. Just as I see him readying to sprint, I ambush him from behind.

He struggles against my grip for a few seconds, but then stops, eyes closing like a prey who's been caught in the net.

"Patroclus." He did not move. I lifted my knees off his back, but did not stand back up. I grabbed his shoulders and turned him around so his chest was almost touching mine.

"I hoped that you would come," I felt my lips turn upwards as I said so. His eyebrows furrow in confusion as he breathes deeply. He opens his mouth to say something when a deep voice from behind us interrupts us both.

"Is the boy hurt?" I whipped my head around.

There stood a centaur, chest bare and wide, legs chestnut, eyes cold.