Be My Escape [BoyxBoy]

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven

~Liam's POV~

When I woke up Michael was gone. I strained to hear if the shower was on and that maybe, Michael hadn't left the house. That maybe he just woke up and was avoiding me by being downstairs. But when I went downstairs and still didn't find him, the worry started to kick in. I held onto the nearest object and brought my other hand up to my heart that was hammering in my chest. My breathing was irregular and I was starting to have a panic attack.

"He's fine. I'm sure he's fine. Just, gone for a walk." I mumbled to myself. But I was already rushing back upstairs and sending five thousand texts to Michael. When the text messages were left unread and no response, and my bottom lip was being torn up by my teeth, I called him.

Straight to voice mail.

I dialed again.

Voice mail.

Again.

Voice mail.

Again.

Voice mail.

"Michael. Please, please, please, pick up. I'm sorry I brought him up. You don't have to talk about it. I just want you to call me. Please. I just need to know you're safe. God, Michael ... just ... please call me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for bringing it up. I'm sorry for making you move. I'm sorry for saying I love you, but I can't help the fact that I do. You're so important to me Michael. I don't want to lose the greatest thing in my life. I can't ... I can't lose you. Just call me back." I was teary eyed and two seconds away from my voice breaking. So I cut myself off.

I dropped the phone onto the bed and tried to stop myself from crying. Although, it wasn't working. I didn't know where he was, or where he might have gone. I didn't know anything and it was so frustrating. Because how could I be so in love with Michael and not know a single fucking thing about him? Or about his past? It shouldn't have been necessary. But it was. It was extremely important. And I don't know anything about it.

"Fuck!" I said, my hands slamming against the bed. My hands squeezed tighter together and I couldn't think of anything. My chest tightened and I realized that I was actually starting to have a panic attack. "Shit. Shit. Shit." I mumbled to myself as a stumbled down the stairs of Michael's house. I was stopped shortly by Carmen and Andi asking if I was okay. I just shook my head and tried to move past them and out the door. Once I was finally out of the house I started sprinting towards my house. My eyes were becoming increasingly blurry and my lungs felt like they were dying with the running on top of everything.

I burst through the door making my mother poke her head out from the kitchen. She looked at me with concern and I just stood there shaking for a moment before taking a sharp breath and then immediately crying. I dropped to the floor as my mom rushed over to me quickly and wrapped me in her arms. I didn't really notice it as I tried to stop shaking and tried to breath. But it wasn't working and I could barely remember where I was. And I felt like I was sobbing and mumbling out something but I couldn't tell.

My hands were grabbing at my mom but I couldn't feel it. I felt like I was dying but I knew I wasn't. It was terrifying and I wanted it to stop but I couldn't do anything. Stop crying. Stop crying. I squeezed harder. Stop crying. You're stupid. Shut up. Stop crying. God, what is wrong with me? My eyes tightened when my chest did and my breathing became even more chopped up and shaky. Please stop. I couldn't tell what I was doing anymore. I started to drift into a void and when I finally regained my sense of reality I was wrapped in a blanket on the couch watching cartoons.

As I stirred slowly on the couch, Jayden who was playing with his action figures and trains on the floor, turned around. He looked at me with wide eyes and rushed to me.