Spin the bottle

chapter 10

W

I was pacing my room, waiting for the knock on my door that would tell me everything was clear and I could go.

As I sat on my - the dorm's, it wasn't mine anymore now- bed, I let my eyes fall shut. Listening to the sound of the rain on the window. I thought that a storm would definitely hit later in the night.

My eyes flung open when the knocking forced my thoughts away. I had to stop thinking about him anyway, I had just ended things. And soon enough, I'll be too far for anything to happen to him because of me. It was all for a better, he'd be happier.

Once I was out of the building, I walked fast and reached the black car in seconds.It was a enough for me to get drenched as I was under the pouring rain. As soon I was in, I took my coat off, leaving me in my white button on only, the two first buttons were undone, my hair dropping droplets of water on it. I was too hot anyway and I didn't care.

After she placed my belongings in the trunk, Malin looked at me in the rear view mirror, questioning, and I nodded. She started the engine and we drove off the schools ground.

Due to some roads being too risky with the rain, we had to take another route from our usual one. It was a bit longer but I couldn't care less and so I connected my headphones, hoping for a distraction. But everything reminded me of him, I had to stop the music half way through the first song. I gave up on finding a distraction and let my head rest against the window. Wishing I could maybe rest and sleep, perhaps I did really started to drift off until the car stopped abruptly, the wheels screeching and my body sent back into the seat harshly. I never had been more grateful for seatbelts until now.

I looked over at Malin, trying to figure what was wrong. But the look she gave me was not good. And she had to say nothing once I had looked outside. The street we were in was lit and I could make the outline of the buildings around us, but that was enough. I knew where we were.

Why did she stop though? I looked past her and saw why.

What the-

I got out of the car without a second thought and pulled him by the wrist on the pavement.

"Simon what the fuck!" I sweared, letting go of his wrist. "For God's sake what are you doing in the middle of the road you idiot!" I said, taking him in. He was in gray sweatpants and had my - I noticed - blue sweatshirt on his back. I went for my coat but it was his turn to grab my wrist.

"I have your location, idiot." He simply said.

What?

"What?" I said out loud, Simon what did you not understand in 'I'm done making you suffer' and in 'We're over.' ?" I asked wide eyed.

He laughed a little. "Wilhelm I understood that perfectly." He said a bit drily.

"But you don't seem to understand! Why are you still here, don't you see I'll only hurt you again?! Over and over again?!" My voice rose in anger and confusion.

"You're the one who doesn't understand! You let people tell you what to do, or you let them make you think they know what you want better than you do! You'll end up into a wall, and I'll have no other choice than watch you crash. Because you are pushing me away, scared you'll hurt me once again," he shouted back."But guess what, Wilhelm? I am here because I fucking love you. How do you not get it yet? This is not something forced. These are my feeling." I looked down, ashamed. "I- Look at me! I mean each and every one of my words. You have got to believe me, please" Tears were straining his beautiful face by now, mixing with the rain.