TW! - this imagine contains depictions of self-harm and mental health issues. if this is something that may trigger or upset you, please refrain from reading. my messages are always open if you need someone to talk to. i love you, take care ♥
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third person pov:
billie anxiously peeks her head into the bedroom to check on her girlfriend for what felt like the one hundredth time.
there she lay, undisturbed, welcoming her fifth hour of slumber. her head resting on her pillow, which is peppered with her teardrops. harsh, jagged breaths escape her lips, a result of all the crying she had done prior to falling asleep.
y/n was struggling mentally, something that happened often. y/n could go from being completely fine, seemingly happy even, to the most sudden and deepest states of depression that could last for days, weeks, and in some cases, months.
it ripped billie's delicate heart in two to see her beautiful girl suffer so miserably. she wished she could make every single ounce of her pain disappear, but that was far from possible.
however, billie was doing everything in her power to mend her, to pick up the scattered pieces of y/n and put her back together, to make her feel happy and whole again, no matter how long it took or how many times she had to do it.
billie wanted nothing more than to scoop her up into her arms and rock her like a little kid. she wanted to cuddle her and kiss her. she wanted to reassure her that everything would be okay, but most of the time y/n would just alienate herself and unintentionally push billie away, ultimately isolating them both.
despite y/n's inadvertent attempts at keeping billie at a distance, billie always reminded y/n that she loved her unconditionally and that she was there when she needed her. it was always a sliver of relief to billie when y/n eventually accepted the comfort that she constantly offered.
billie releases a worried sigh and leans her head against the doorframe. although she was glad to see y/n finally getting some decent sleep, she wondered when y/n would wake. there was really no telling, as her sleeping habits were all over the place.
billie leaves the door ajar so she can listen out for y/n. she quietly enters the kitchen, deciding to make y/n a snack for when she woke. she couldn't remember the last time she had seen her eat, she barely touched food when she was in a depressive episode.
daily self-care tasks became increasingly difficult for y/n, they felt more like chores that were too challenging for her to complete. with the paramount of exhaustion and despair that invaded her mind, leaving the bed was a rare occurrence.
billie scans the fridge for something that she could persuade her girlfriend into eating. she spotted some strawberries, y/n's favourite fruit. billie rinsed the vibrant fruits, dried them briefly, chopped off the leafy stems, and placed them on a plate.
billie randomly remembered how a few weeks ago y/n wanted a bite of her peanut butter and jelly sandwich. she had given her a bite, which eventually led to y/n practically thieving her entire sandwich.
billie giggled lightly to herself as the image of her adorable girlfriend with her cheeks stuffed full of sandwich replayed in her mind. she thought to make her one to accompany the strawberries.
just as billie finishes assembling the sandwich, she hears movement upstairs. she froze and stood quietly, listening for confirmation of y/n's possible awakening.
it doesn't take long until the silence is interrupted by y/n's familiar sobs. billie instantly rushes to the bedroom, y/n's sobbing gets painfully louder with each hurried step she takes.