Her Redemption

13. Pain

I truly despise being a woman sometimes.

I feel like I just got hit by a truck on the highway that was speeding.

My whole body aches.

It's the time of the month.

Day two to three is always the worst for me.

Which means no work, no scenes, no sex.

There may be some people who enjoy doing it on their periods but for me it's dreadful. My flow is so heavy that I can't enjoy it. It's way too wet and I feel nothing.

My hormones go out of wack too making me moody and sensitive. More than I already am. Poor Tommy would never understand why I was crying this morning while making him his oatmeal. I cried because I realized he was growing so fast and he wanted to try to feed himself.

I also cried because Bryan hasn't talked to me in a week. One whole entire week.

I don't what happened after our last scene but he hasn't reached out to me. And when I tried reaching out to him he was unavailable or didn't respond.

I'm not sure what I did. We went out to lunch, we talked, had fun. Maybe it's something I said?

I hate overthinking. I especially hate overthinking while on my period.

I groan shifting my body on the couch. I've been laying here for about a good three hours. The first hour Tommy was cuddling with me and then I put him to bed. The second hour I started watching mean girls movie because why not? And now the third hour my cramps are so bad and I really want a banana mango smoothie.

But we don't have bananas and mangoes.

It's 9 at night.

No one is home but Tommy and I.

My mom is out of town to collaborate with another chef that's in San Francisco.

My brother went back to living at his house.

I'm alone.

I haven't been alone for a very long time. It's weird, sometimes I don't know what to do with myself.

I'm pulled out of my thoughts when there's a knock on the front door.

Who the fuck is here and how did they get passed the gate?

I groan loudly annoyed I have to move my body. I swear if it's someone here to kill me, I'll put period blood all over them.

I'm thrown off when it's no other than Bryan himself

Great

I'm wearing black leggings and a large grey raggedy shirt that was dads and my hair is up in a messy bun with my blonde curls falling all over the place.

And to top it off, I have zit cream on and gel pads under my eyes.

Double great

A smile spreads across his face, I look down and see he's wearing a black tracksuit and a brown bag in his hands.

What the fuck does he want now?

"May I help you?" I ask him with a serious face. I don't have time for petty bullshit. He literally ignored me all week.

His smile disappears as he's thrown off by my tone of voice.

I move my hand for him to speak getting impatient.