Akame: Met a dumbass today. Awful.
Author-Chan: You looked in a mirror?
Akame: someday you will have to answer for your actions and god may not be so merciful.
~
Nanami: Do you want to be the Sun in my life?
Author-Chan: Yes.
Nanami: Good, then stay 92,935,700 miles away from me
~
Kidnapper: We have your child
Akame: I don't have a child?
Kidnapper: Then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?
Akame: Oh god, you have Author-Chan
~
Akame: What are you drinking?
Author-Chan: Vodka.
Akame: Straight?
Author-Chan: No, gay. Why?
~
Akame: Are you really planning to shoot the demon?
Author-Chan: Don't worry, it's a holy gun.
Akame: How so?
Author-Chan: It makes holes.
~
*Akame and Author-Chan looking at a locked gate into a park*
Akame: Aw. :(
Author-Chan: You know what they say.
Akame: Please don't-
Author-Chan: BE GAY DO CRIME! *hops gate*
Akame: Frick-
~
Akame: What's gone wrong, Author-Chan?
Author-Chan: Hey! That's one hell of a thing to say to a person. Just because I'm calling doesn't mean there's a crisis.
Akame: That's technically true, I suppose. Why are you calling?
Author-Chan: Well... There's a crisis.
~
Akame: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.
Author-Chan: Killed without hesitation.
~
Akame: Stop setting things on fire because you're curious about what will happen. What will happen is fire.
Author-Chan: But what if something else happens just this one time?
~
Author-Chan: *Kicks the door open, looking panicked*
Akame: What did you do?!
Author-Chan: NOBODY DIED!
Akame: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!
~
Angie (BFF): You look mentally ill.
Author-Chan: We both are. Let's go.
~
Author-Chan: Why should I make my bed, when I'm just gonna unmake it to sleep in it anyways?
Annie: Why should I feed you if your just gonna die anyways?
Author-Chan:
Author-Chan: I'll go make my bed-
~
Annie: Let's write Author-Chan a friendly note, shall we? Dear... Incompetent... Dumbass...
~
Annie: How was your day, Author-Chan?
Author-Chan: Yeah, fine, it's anti-bullying week at school.
Annie: Oh? And what does that mean?
Author-Chan: It means I can't bully anyone for a whole week.
