Loving Valentino

~Overdrive~

I haven't seen Valentino since he went  to Sicily three days ago. He said he had some business to tend to and left it at that. I'd ask my dad, but I don't want to raise any suspicion. Valentino hasn't texted me since he left and I'm not sure how to feel about it. He's probably just busy or something.

On the bright side, Lincoln and I got to spend more time together and we caught up on alot of stuff over these three days. I've missed him. I never really get to see him anymore outside of classes, and I hate that. So I decided that we needed to catch up. Now we're walking into our favorite diner for milkshakes and fries.

"Everytime I walk in here all my troubles float away." Lincoln sighs dreamily as he lets me walk in first.

I laugh at his dramatic antics and walk over to our favorite booth. It's in this dimly lit corner with a window on one end. Sitting here makes me feel like one of those girls I've saved on Pinterest.

We both take our seats and wait for a waiter to take our order.

"We should go to the bookstore after this." I say after a while.

"Yeah I'm down with that." He responds looking around our beloved dinner.

"Hi! I'm Annie. I'll be your waitress today." A joyful girl around my age comes up to our table.

She wears her light brown hair in a high ponytail with her curtain bangs framing her face. Her eyelashes touch her cheeks everytime she blinks and a full smile graces her slender lips. She's gorgeous.

"Hi!" I match her energy.

I notice her eying Lincoln who is completely clueless as to what's going on.

"Can we get two cookies and cream milkshakes and a large fries please?" I ask her already knowing what we wanted.

"Of course  I'll be back in fifteen minutes." she smiles sweetly and walks away with a blush.

"You are so oblivious it's crazy." I turn my attention back to Lincoln.

"I didn't even do anything." He responds with confusion written all over his face.

"Exactly!" I  throw my hands up in the air.

"That girl was clearly into you. It was so obvious." I make it clearer for him.

"Oh."

I laugh at his clueless face and my eyes catch Annie looking at him from the counter she's standing at.

"Well,do you think she's pretty?" I ask him.

"I mean- yeah- um I guess." He stutters out and I take that as confirmation to play matchmaker.

I get up from the booth without saying a word and make my way over to Annie.

"Hi!" I say hoping she doesn't think I'm crazy.

"Hello" she smiles sheepishly.

"That's my bestfriend Lincoln over there. He's single and he told me that he thinks you're pretty. You should go talk to him." I say gauging her response.

Her face beets bright red at my words.

"Or not! No pressure of course." I say hoping to calm her down.

"Thanks for telling me, but I'm too nervous." She lets out, while swiping her hair behind her ears.

"Well okay, and I love your bangs by the way." I compliment her and begin walking back to the booth when my phone rings.

Valentino.

I signal to Lincoln that I'm gonna go outside for a minute and walk out of the diner.

"Hi." I answer his call with slight anxiety.

"Whats wrong?" He immediately replies.

"Nothing?" I say more like a question.

He left for three days and hasn't texted me since. Why does he think everything is going to be peaches and cream?

"Are you ignoring me tesora?" He asks more knowingly.

Yes, because I thought you forgot about me.

"No, I just didn't wanna bother you on your trip." I lie horribly.

His deep laugh echos through the phone and suddenly I miss him even more.

"When I get back how about we finish our talk? Yeah?" He asks with an edge to his voice.

"Okay."

"And for fucks sake, stop ignoring me Adelaine. I can't take that."  He grits out the last part as if it pains him to admit.

"O- okay." I stutter out and hang up the phone.

Its like all my thoughts get tangled up into one giant ball when I see him or hear his voice. I don't know what it means, but I do know that I like the feeling. Really like it actually. I'm still not sure what we are, but I crave him more than i should. I think about him more than I should. I want him more than I should. I just don't want to get hurt.

I erase Valentino from my head and head back inside to Lincoln, only to see the waitress walking back from our booth with teary eyes.

Oh shit.

                                                                                          ~~~

"I just don't understand why you turn every girl who show's even the tiniest bit of interest in you down." I shove a spoonful of cereal in my mouth, adjusting myself in Lincoln's bed.

"They're just not...my type." He stutters out.

"So what is your type?" I asks genuinely curious.

The last time I saw Lincoln show interest in a girl was probably high school and they lasted for eight months. I don't think she was his first love though.

He looks over at me and his eyes hold an emotion I can't decipher.

"We should watch a movie." He changes the topic and I don't even push it any further.

I nod my head, and before I know it, he's playing Moana for the millionth time.

"Not again." I sigh

"It's a good movie!"

Two movies, half bowl more of cereal, a pack of gummy bears, and four hours later, Lincoln is in a deep sleep beside me.  I'm up thinking about everything. My mom, Valentino, that adorable cat I saw on Pinterest, just everything.

Sometimes I just get these random waves of sadness and it fucks up my whole life for a while. I usually isolate myself until I feel better, but Valentino would think I'm ignoring him. He doesn't really know me yet, seeing as we are still learning each other, but I want him to know.

I check the time on my phone and sigh as my eyes catch sight of various unanswered messages. I leave a sticky note on the side of Lincoln's bed, saying that I left and leave his house.

I get in my car and begin driving to the place that always seems to calm me. After a while, I arrive in front of the abandoned building and get out. I grab my headphones and my phone and use the side door to get in.

I love this place more than I love my actual house. I first found out about it the night dad had his heart attack. I was walking along the street with tears streaming down my face and the rain was ruthless that night. I took shelter in here and shortly realized that it was an abandoned library. I haven't told anyone about this place and I don't plan to.

I make my way up to the top floor and climb out of the small window, taking a seat on the damp roof. The view was so beautiful. The autumn leaves were falling every other minute and orange and pink pastels covered the evening sky. People were walking on the street and some shops were closing up for the day.

  It's so weird how we can feels so small in a world filled with people. Sometimes my thoughts get the best of me and I can't control them. Sometimes I feel so much at once that my brain goes into overdrive. Sometimes I need to be alone to figure all of my shit out. I connect my headphones and drown my thoughts away in the one thing that has always managed to make me feel less alone. Music.