When you were writing Captive did you purposely make kid not extremely physically violent with birdie on purpose or did it just never come up? I just noticed that besides a lot of sexual violence he doesn't seem to hurt her much in the way of the kind of "torture" you would expect from someone like him. In canon he crucified people for Christ sake and in your story he snapped Kolbys legs like pretzel sticks, so I was just curious if even in the beginning of her time with him he had a reason for not going for hitting or otherwise injuring her outside of sticking his fingers in her wounds.
PRETZEL STICKS! Rip Koby. 😭
Anyway, coming to your question! There are several possible explanations why Kid wasn't (seriously) physically violent with birdie. He found her snarky attitude amusing, alluring even, and he didn't want to wipe it out just yet. He could have, easily. That's what Killer meant when he said she "dug her way out just with her mouth". By standing up to Kid even when she was terrified, she caught his interest and effectively saved herself. Then she earned his respect.
That's what happened the night Koby came for her, for example. Kid was ready to torture her to death, and the way she yells at him before changes his mind last second.
Or you could say he just found her attractive and wanted to f*ck her without disfiguring her first, I bet that's what Kid would say if you asked this question to him.
You're right to be surprised, even the crew was. Killer too.
However it's not like Kid didn't want to hurt her at all. Being a sadist, in a way, the person he wants the most is also the one he craves to hurt the most. And, at the same time, he doesn't want them to suffer, or be repelled by him as a consequence. So he lives a real internal struggle. I briefly touched upon this point in the story when she asks Kid if he wanted to hurt her, and he replies something like "it's complicated" to cut it short.
I hope I answered your question! :D
Been casually lurking for a while, but the recent ask and answers have been really interesting about birdie x Kid. What I find really interesting is how you talked about Kid's struggle with his sadism. Like, he clearly cares about her, but wants her in pain at the same time. I don't really know if you'd have an answer for this, but looking at Kid's character (or at least your interpretation), do you think he feels guilt about hurting those he cares about or that the sadistic part of him would negate that?
I do find it really interesting too, that at the end of your story, Kid lets her go because it's arguably what's best for her mind. But, would the sadistic part of him want to keep her suffering as a prisoner as well? I just thought this contrast and juxtaposition that you pointed out is so interesting, not only for your story, but also for analysis of his character.
I find this inner dualism in Kid fascinating, that's why I hinted at it in Captive. I didn't expand too much on it for various reasons (it's a complicated topic, and the story was told from birdie's POV), but it might come up again in the future.
I can mostly speculate and go along with my headcanon for it, but yes, I do think Kid does feel guilty when it hurts the people he cares about. It may not be right away, he may even not be able to recognise his uneasiness as guilt, but he would.
We also need to make a distinction between guilt and regret. According to the situation, Kid could feel both, either or none of these feelings, depending on who he hurt, how and what was the result of it.
I'm not sure I was able to explain myself there?
In my head, there's a dark, secluded corner of his mind where he still indulges in the fantasy of keeping birdie for himself and torment her as he pleases. But he rarely goes there, because the very same fantasy and the pleasure that comes with it cause a surge of guiltiness that makes his guts churn.
