My Last Snow | Mark Lee

epilogue 2

mark.

I remember my first ever snow.

I was at a holiday house in Canada with my family, watching the snow fall from the bare branches as we sat behind the fireplace, scrubbing our hands together for heat. I remember hearing my cousins and my parents, fighting over who should've won monopoly and who was to clean up the trash that was going to be left on this small coffee table by midnight. I used to pull all types of tricks to get out of cleaning. Sometimes, we would rush outside to build snowmen that were called Tim and Tom and draw hearts in the snow until our fingers went numb. At a measly age of 4, I held the whole world in my tiny hands. Though, I never saw Canadian snow again.

I remember my fourth snow.

I saw a girl that looked at us with hatred and envy. A girl that changed my perspective about myself in an instant. A girl that made me wonder what the world was like outside of my own bubble. It was the first time I paid attention to the raging snow outside the window behind her. It was pouring, like little knives. I wished I could stand under the snow.

I remember my fifth snow.

I saw her beautiful figure standing beside the tree, little flakes of snow sprinkled upon her head like cotton candy. She looked like an angel sculpted with the finest brushes of god and I wanted to hug her and never let her go. Snow never looked as beautiful as it did now.

I remember my sixth snow.

I held hands with the angel. We walked down the snow covered paths and laughed through the day. I remember the snow on that day distinctly. It was soft, and much like the snow back in Canada. I don't know if it was the snow itself, or the fact that I was with her, but that day was magical. I felt like I was inside a snow globe, with her.

I remember my last snow.

I held the torch in my hand, my eyes trailed upon her thin body. She was feeble, and weak, but still beautiful as ever. My eyes would not leave her face, like they were glued to her beautiful complexion. I stood under the snow, each snowflake raining upon my skin. My cheeks felt hot, my body warm and my heart pure numbness. Somethings in life we just can't escape...I knew that. But when I was faced with that inescapable destiny, it was crushing, suffocating.

I wanted to hold her within my arms and whisper words of comfort in her ear. I wanted to kiss her like it was just us two on top of our own little cloud. I wanted to tell her all the funny stories I shared with my members. I wanted to hold her hand and stand on stage with her, yelling out to the world that she was my girlfriend and soon to be wife. I wanted to cradle our child in our arms, and hope they will find their happy futures too.

I wanted everything to do with her. I wanted her.

A small bead of grief rolled my cheek. A small piece of me shattered. The muted beeping of her monitor blasted in my ears like a ticking bomb.

I touched the window, my fingers fogging up the glass. She tried to reach up to touch me.

I placed my forehead against the window

and collapsed.

That's the tragedy of loving her because I was so addicted to everything about her. In the end, I was ready to give all of this up. I was out of my mind with love. I didn't think twice about throwing myself into the your blazing heart...the fire that ignited everything around me. I wanted to sit beside you and your pale glow.

And that's how I loved her in the end. With my body cold and shuddering. With empty hands over smouldering ashes, counting the minutes.

I love her, and I'm glad my last snow is with her.

wooooo

yay

it's over

i really enjoyed writing this book and this book hit quite hard for me. it's an emotional one and i tried my best to portray the realism of the things that occur in this book.

ANYWAYS

see u in the next book then !!