Heartdriven

12. The Circus Continues

It was quite an experience to walk such a historic circuit like the streets of Monaco, strolling where many cars had been rolling before and having her feet places where the tyres would be spinning over the weekend.
Daniel had suggested Alice take some photos during the walk, which she had intended but was given the go ahead to use him on her canvas, too. She was photographing everything she could think of, it was such a trial run and she could go through them all later, learning the best approach for the few remaining races she had.

Leaning down in the tunnel, to get a photo of Daniel's silhouette exiting with the light surrounding him, she got a tickle on both of her ribs and lost her balance in surprise, tripping back on her bottom. He leaned over her head from behind, revealing himself.
"Hello" he calmly said and put his hands under her armpits and lifted her up from the ground, holding onto her as he moved around her and gave her a hug.
She put one arm around his back, the other around her camera, and rested her head on his shoulder. He pulled a little bit away from her and kissed her on the cheek as she placed her hand on his chest, "Sebastian..."
A group of people in Red Bull team gear were walking out of the exit of the tunnel and they were all alone.
"I've missed you," his hands moved down to hers and held them in one each.
He was looking at her but she was facing down, responding "Likewise."
He placed her fingers around her chin and lifted her face up to look at him, "Is something the matter?"
She didn't lie, she had missed him. She didn't want things to change, she wanted to be with him. But she needed to confront him, which she had not thought through, hoping the words would come to her in the moment.
"Who are you?" He looked at her surprised but very well knowing what she meant.
"I really liked you, I really like you... I didn't want something to get in the way—" she interrupted him before he could finish his sentence, "I didn't keep anything from you, I would have told you everything."
Seeing the moisture build in her eyes, he understood the depth of her hurt went beyond a neglect of information. "I am sorry." He tried to hold her in an embrace but she ushered his arms away.
"It's not about who you are, but that you deliberately... tricked me for your own gains," her once whisper had raised to a calmer voice as she distanced herself from him.
"I didn't expect... it was supposed to be anonymous, I tried to keep it that way. But you got to know me, not who they say I am. I'm not gonna lie and say I didn't enjoy it—", she stared at him with that frown between her eyebrows, as he continued, "—because being with you... was the most things have made sense to me, the most sure I have been in myself."
They looked at each other, both confused. She was confused by how deep she had felt his words, that the short time they had spent together had meant as much to him as it had to her. He was confused by the intense emotion behind her reaction.
Cutting off their eye contact by the mutters heard in the distance, Alice turned on her feet and walked out of the tunnel with Sebastian shortly behind her.

She walked fleetly down towards Daniel, who was standing at the chicane with his team. Passing by the group of Red Bull people, looking over her shoulder, she saw Sebastian join his group as she caught up to hers.
"Did you get some shots?" Daniel shouted at her when she was nearing them.
"I hope so!" she forced a smile at him.
She had learned he was good at that, the distraction, and she leaned into it. Think about something else.
"I had something I want to show you," he waved her towards the barrier.
"See, now this is a decent place, you can catch the cars right outta the tunnel, down to here and over there, where there's sure to be plenty of action over the weekend... Well, by Monaco-standards, y'know," he winked at her and put his hand on the top of her head, rustling her hair and she grinned.
He looked at his wristwatch and his demeanour changed, "Oh shit, we need to get going, if we're gonna see the chequered flag before I'm called on duty for the media pen."
They continued their walk and she glanced behind at Sebastian, who was falling behind with his team rather than closing in to her.

As they approached the garage and Daniel had to leave for his media duties, she grabbed onto his wrist and pulled him aside, "Why are you being so kind to me?"
He looked at her sincerely and waited for his team to walk back into the garage. "I don't know. I guess... Y'know, maybe I'm just a bit homesick and you reminded me of my sister when I first saw you. I don't know."
He looked vulnerable, so she decided to use his own approach of dealing with situations, "Can't she get a word into the conversation either?"
His face lit up and he put his arm around her shoulder, "Exactly, haha." He rubbed her arm before letting go and headed towards the garage. "Smell ya' later."