Moments II: A BWWM Short Story Collection

III. Just Friends (Pt. 2 of 2)

After a bit of pressing, Kent agreed to a three-dollar bomb-pop at the snack shack. I got my usual fudgsicle (also three dollars, ugh), then followed Kent as he walked back towards the table we'd left our stuff at. And all the while, I fiddled with the packaging on my dessert to avoid looking at Kent.

Not sure why I did, avoiding Kent had been what got me into this mess in the first place. One missed summer from a freak cold and suddenly I was afraid to meet him up at the water park again. I knew it was childish, but I couldn't bear to face him until today.

I made the mistake of taking a quick peek at Kent and whished I hadn't. He wasn't aware of it, but he'd grown almost a foot over high school, and his shoulders had become wide and powerful. I tried to erase the split-second image of his deep back muscles flexing beneath his curly brown mane, but my hormones refused to comply.

"We can sit here, Majesty." Kent said glumly as he sat down at our table.

"Y-yeah." I managed as I took the spot opposite him.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. I was so stupid to miss the last two summers with Kent. What did I expect to happen? That he'd come to my house in tears saying that he was lonely? Did I really think we'd be anything more than friends? Margaret was right, I didn't deserve him. I had no one to blame but myself.

I opened my fudgsicle in the usual neat way, sliding it out as Kent took small bites of his bomb-pop. I popped my dessert in my mouth, but the hum of icy-cool chocolate did little to soothe the burning in my heart.

"Thanks. F-for trying, I mean." Kent said.

"Mmf?" I said.

Kent sighed. "I-I mean, I appreciate you trying to cheer me up, but... but I've got some real problems right now. Finals and... college applications. Y'know."

I nodded, trying to keep my face neutral even as my heart plummeted. I'd known this was coming ever since I backed out of going to senior prom with Kent. Even though he'd made it clear to everyone we were going as friends, I endured so much teasing and gossip that I couldn't bear to go through with it. I hadn't even had the courtesy to tell him the bad news in person, I'd just sent him a text.

I sent the boy I loved more than anything in the world a text saying I didn't feel like going to a night we'd never get back.

Kent finished the cherry layer and began on the vanilla, and I snuck another glance at him. He thought he was good at hiding it, but I could tell he was in turmoil, and the cause wasn't hard to guess. I had no right to suddenly re-enter his life when he was on the verge of going on to bigger and better things. And yet here I was, too afraid to let go to a man who could have any woman he desired.

Really, if it weren't for finals and college prep, Kent would probably already be going out with someone else. He was just working up the courage to give me a long overdue farewell, a feat I hadn't made easier with my reckless flirting.

I bit down until my teeth met wood. I'd waffled back and forth between my old swimsuit and something that actually fit me; why did I go with the one that made me look desperate? Was I really fooling anyone with my inner pep talk about a reset button when I knew I just wanted to show off to Kent? And then I threw Angela under the bus when I'd deliberately forgotten to notify her about this outing to get Kent alone.

I chewed on melted fudge as I looked down in shame. I was never like this before. I'd never deceived my friends or used underhanded tricks to get a guy to notice me. I'd even lied to Kent by pretending I'd never gone on the Vortex in the hopes that he'd take me in his muscular arms and hold me all the way down.

And the fact that it actually happened just made me feel worse.

"So... have you decided?" Kent asked. "On a college?"