Showtime

21.1. "Showtime", Part 1

[Avni: It's been a hard night. Everything that's been happening for the past month or two hadn't really hit me till last night. I saw North High absolutely dominate that stage and that tiny self- doubt that sprang up in my mind just grew and grew and consumed my night. And I'm not sure what's going to happen on stage today. And I know there's a lot hanging in the balance, a lot of responsibility on my shoulders so I just feel - terrible.]

"You ready?"

"I suppose so," Avni answered her mother. She opened her mouth to say something, but Avni cut her off, "Not a good answer- I know. Can we leave?" She looked around.

They all stared awkwardly for a second and then her dad moved out the door, breaking the spell. Her mum was next out. Avni was stepping out too when-

"Avni," her brother stopped her. She turned to look at him expectantly.

"Are you ok?"

"No."

"What did those North High kids do last night?"

"Khoon1. They killed it."

"I'm sure you guys will be good too."

"Yeah," Avni nodded. "But what happens after the curtain call?" She asked, her mind running too fast and too slow at the same time.

Her brother looked at her quizzically. She shook her head and started to make her way to the door.

"What happens after the curtain call?" he asked.

"It ends."

♡♡♡♡♡

Avni sat cross- legged smack in the middle of the stage, eyes closed, tears streaming down her cheeks.

It was fairly dark- there was only faint light that poured out from backstage.

She was too much in her head, she knew. She had shake this off and put her best face forward-

"Avni?"

She wiped her tears quickly and whipped around.

"Yeah?" she asked casually.

He saw right through it.

"What's wrong?"

She turned to look back out at the rows of seats. "Nothing. Just feeling at one with the stage."

He sat down in front of her. "Looks like you're feeling a lot more."

A single tear escaped her right eye. Her right eye always teared up more, she'd noticed. It was weird.

She looked down at her hands, shoulders slumped. "I've just had a difficult day. I've come to terms with myself- and I don't really like what I see," she said slowly.

"That's not called coming to terms with yourself," he said. "You haven't liked what you saw for a long time now."

She looked at him, surprised, exposed.

"We've been friends for a while now, Avni. You have a way of talking about yourself," he replied before she could express her astonishment.

She looked away at his words. "You're making me feel really transparent right now. And I just got told that I'm a very hard person to read, so."

"You are. But I think I've made considerable gains over the years."

Avni half- laughed, guard slipping down completely. "I just- I did this whole Broadway plan thing- which was so under handed- without a second thought. Like, I just did it. I didn't think- and for what?"