"Akk's dead..."
It was a short sentence. But that very short sentence managed to make Ayan speechless. He could hear Kan calling his name out several times.
"You wait there, okay? Thua is on the way to get you. Dont be impulsive." Kan said. But Ayan just stood there, motionless. His phone was still on his ear, and Kan's voice could be heard from time to time. But Ayan was unresponsive.
His ears were ringing, he couldnt clearly hearing anything after that one sentence. In his head, he kept saying to himself.
"Please, someone tell me that this was all just a joke."
Ayan was on a verge of breaking down.
**
After a few minutes, Thua finally able to reach Ayan, who was still stood there seems so lost and out of place.
Thua grabbed Ayan's arms and shook his body, calling his name over and over until Ayan finally looked at him. Still without saying a word. His eyes were so dull, Ayan was in a daze.
"Lets go, we'll meet Akk, Aye!" When his ears cathes the word Akk, he finally able to move although Thua still need to basically pull him along the way.
Once they got into Thua's car, Thua rushed his car to Akk's parent's house while Ayan was just there, motionless.
Thua was worried sick seeing Ayan like this, he just dont know what would happen once Ayan saw Akk later. He just knew that he needs to be there for his friend.
**
After a few hours drive, they arrived at Akk's parents' house. The house was slightly crowded, a lot of people have come. Akk's neighbors and some of their classmates that lived around the area, even Teacher Sani was present.
Thua helped Ayan walked into the house. Inside was Akk's parent. When their eyes saw Ayan coming in that state, they approached him and hugging him tightly. Saying that everything would be okay, despite their own grief.
But Ayan attention was not on them. His eyes was glued to a black coffin in the middle of the room instead. Inside it was his Akk, laying motionlessly.
For the first time his numbness disappeared, replaced with what he would described as unexplainable pain, piercing through his chest. Creating a void that if its visible, would oozing out blood like a waterfall.
His whole body was trembling as his mouth opens trying to say something, but no voice could come out. Slowly, tears creeping out of his eyes, falling free leaving traces on his cheeks. The pain in his chest getting intense before he rushed to Akk's side and screaming his name in agony.
He cant contain himself as he called his boyfriend's name.
"AKK! AKK WAKE UP! DONT LEAVE ME!"
All the people in the room started to cry along with Ayan's scream. Soon, Akk's mom pulled Ayan into her embrace, trying to ease the younger's agony.
**
That day, Akk's parent didnt call him at all. It was all made up by Akk. He orchestrated everything himself.
He was okay at first, with his friends, family, and even all his junior at Suppalo supporting him. He also have Ayan with him. That should be enough.
Its just that no matter what, the guilt he feel kept coming back. Reminding him of all bad deeds he had done with both of his hands. He felt terrible, extremely terrible. His guilty conscience drown him, makes him dying inside slowly until he just can take it anymore.
He dont want Ayan to be with a bad person like him. He dont want his parents to have a disgraceful son. He just want to disappear.
Being student prefect took a toll on him, but it also made him learn something. That is to keep things to himself. To keep secret from others. And he did it. He did an excellent job at it.
He fooled his own boyfriend, his family and his friends. Saying he was okay, until that day police officers found his lifeless body on a shore. A few kilometers away from his house.
He got the sea washed away his pain, his guilt, all his wrongdoing.
And as an exchange, he let them took his own life. Forever.
**
Ayan walked closer to the sea. The darkness seems to be calling his name. His mind was empty, only agony exist on it.
The sand under his feet getting more wet after each step he took in. Soon, he could felt the wave crashing on his feet.
The more he walked, the more he felt like floating. Ayan closed his eyes. Tears were falling.
"Akk, i'm coming." He said with a smile visible on his face, so ready to submerge his head into the sea.
You left me, Akk. But its okay, i'm gonna be the one coming after you. Just you wait, Akk. My Akk.
***
