It's only drugs

My brain is all yours

I feel like this is the best chapter so far. I really enjoyed writing this. The song above is by Margo Guryan. I absolutely adore her music. It's so sweet. It literally feels like love.

TW; underage drinking, underage smoking, mention of drug use, very brief mention of statutory rape, and abuse

(Word count; 2700)

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I'm sipping on my scorching hot tea, watching fallen for the thirteenth time this week, when I hear Boris ask Theo something that makes Val go white and run to Theo. Boris and Val are both looking over Theo's shoulder. I walk over too and lean onto the kitchen island so I can see. Theo is, or was, writing a letter to this girl called Pippa. Worst name ever if you ask me. 

"What happened to her? Did you hit her?" Boris asks making Val, Theo and me all turn to him. "What?!" I ask frowning. "Her head, that's why your apologizing. You hit her head or something?" Boris explains pointing to the letter. I reread it and it doesn't seem too weird Boris would assume that.

"You have a girlfriend?" Val asks, but not in a jealous way, more in a really careful way. I look at her from the corner of my eye. She looks back, nudging me in my side. "Do you have a girlfriend, Theo? We're all very curious to know" I say grinning. "No, she's just...she's just a friend" Theo slowly says rereading his letter over and over. 

"Ahh, that's what they all say," I say shrugging and turning to Val with a 'sorry' expression. Valerie is still my sister. I get to tease her. "So you don't have a girlfriend," Val asked ignoring me. "I guess not" Theo mumbled shrugging. 

Theo reread his letter one more time before asking Boris "You think I beat up girls?". "Maybe she deserved it," Boris says still looking over Theo's paper. "Um, we don't hit women in America," Theo said making me roll my eyes the hardest I could. "No. Americans persecute smaller countries that believe differently from them," Boris said eating his apple the loudest he could. 

"Just shut up and leave me alone," Theo said ushering us away. Boris slung his arm around my shoulder. It's weird, but Boris is apparently a really touchy person. Not too much just like little nudges and poking to get my attention. Or putting his arm around my shoulder and leaning on me when we're watching a movie. It's nice but weird. I'm not sure how I feel about it. On one hand, it's really nice finally getting physical affection. But on the other hand, it's so friendly.

I've never gotten the impression Boris is gay, not that you have to see in on a person for them to be gay, I just don't think he's into guys. I don't even know if I'm into guys. The only thing I know is that I like talking to Boris, being with Boris and looking at Boris looking at me. I've never had a girlfriend, let alone a fucking boyfriend. What the fuck would I know about liking someone. 

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Later that day, we'd gotten drunk, and now I'm laying with Boris on his bed. Downstairs Val had probably connected my iPod to the stereo because it was blasting all my favourite songs. I don't care enough to go downstairs. 

I keep laying on the bed. A couple of minutes, or hours, later Boris flips himself over so he's lying on his stomach and facing me. "Hi," I say smiling "Hi," he says back. "Do you ever regret doing anything?" he slurs. "What?" "Like you look so sure of everything you do. You never have a day where things don't go your way. You never trip or drop something. You do everything so...so gracefully I guess is the right word" dropping his head face first on the mattress, like saying that took everything. 

I laugh a little. "Oh no, I regret a lot of things. This one time my best friend pissed herself during PE. Instead of helping her, I turned to everybody in the class and literally shouted 'Everybody, Oxana pissed herself'. She never got mad at me but I hated myself" I say and Boris can't stop laughing.