A Journal

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 Nabasa ko iyong isinulat kong love letter about sa feelings ko sa failed ex-mu ko. 

Napapangiti nalang ako at tanggap na na ganoon talaga siguro sa love. One time you are so in love with that person, and then suddenly because of some unexpected circumstance,they are now a memory you will regret for a lifetime. 

Maybe for  some people they are grateful that they were given a chance to be romantically involved with a person, even if it did not work out. And probably happy for the short time they spent together and will treasure the memory they created. But mine was really a regret. If given a chance to go back, I would never have dated that person. I learned so many lessons though—and that I am grateful of. 

I just wish that we know how things end. Lalo na pagdating sa pag-ibig. Sana bago tayo mag-risk sa isang tao, makikita na natin agad kung sila na ba o hindi. Kung sila na ba iyong endgame natin o baka another trauma at sakit sa puso lang muli. Sayang kasi ng feelings, time, memories, at pagmamahal natin kung ibibigay lang pala sa taong 'di naman natin makakatuluyan sa huli. Worst baka lokohin lang tayo.

I dislike wasted efforts and affection, because it wasn't appreciated and treasured the way it deserves. I hate making memories with a person only for them to betray you and hurt you intentionally. I hate being taken for granted. I hate gambling for another chance in love only to get another heartbreak.

Maybe love and relationships are not for me. And that is okay. Because I think I am better off alone. Alone but happier. Alone but loved by few rare solid as diamond people. Alone but there is liberty and peace of mind.