Far Away

2

So it has been three days since the sleepover kind of thing happened and he is still quiet about it. I will just ask him It's a long drive to this place where Harry will cook for some rich people so I will just ask him. Come on Louis u can do it.

"Ehm boss I mean harry ehm do you remeber anything about saturday evening"

He looked at me with serious look

"Louis I wasn't thinking straight I apologise for my actions"

"It's totally fine boss ehm harry"

He smirked at me

"As I said before u can call me Harry"

"Oh yeah right ehm sorry"

Then we sat in silence and jezus I couldn't stay silent

"Harry did u really cut youself"

He looked at me scared

"I- I did yeah, but look at the sun today Its so nice outside so we shouldn't talk about this kind of things. How have u been Louis?"

I saw that he is uncomfortable so I didn't go any deeper into that topic

"I have been fine"

Then everything was silent for the rest of the drive

We arrived and he told me that I can park the car and go to the kitchen with him, because he will be the only one in there. I was confused, but also I would be bored in the car waiting and also I never saw him cook before so why not

The house was soo big and the kitchen also, he looked at me with those green eyes

"Lou just sit on that chair right there and we can talk so u won't be bored also I like some company while I'm cooking"

Did I blush. Did he gave me a nickname. I like it. He said it so softly.
So I sat down and he started talking.

"So Lou..Is it alright if i call u that?"

He saw me blush and I don't even know why I blushed

"Yeah yeah ofc"

"So Lou tell me do you have any siblings"

"Well yeah i have a bunch of sisters and the best mom in the world"

"A lot of women in the house huh?"

He kind of laughed

"Yeah but I am not really interested in that"

Wait what did I just say. Did I just came out. TO HIM. Do I even mean what I said. Well I never had a girlfriend and I never looked at them really. I never carried a girl to bed or cuddled with one. Shit. Maybe I like him. No Louis stop u don't mean that. Get your ass together. He looked me in the eyes

"You are not interested in women?

I looked at the floor as if it was something embarrassing and ofc its not its just that I never really came out to someone. I didn't even came out to myself.

"Louis it's fine I can understand"

I looked into his eyes oh gosh they are so green as trees, as the most beautiful lake, they look like emerald, like a piece of art

"Louis tell me what do u like to do"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I suppose you have some hobbies. Like I have cooking well its my job, but anyway. So tell me what's yours"

"I like to sing"

"So you like to sing. Thats kinda impressive"

"Well I never said I am good at it"

"Oh but I am sure you are. Come on sing me something"

I was kinda surprised by his words, but I felt really comfortable so I started to sing "when the party's over" by Billie Eilish

"Tore my shirt to stop you bleedin' but nothing ever stops you leavin' "

While i sang I saw a single tear coming down his red cheek so I stopped

"No lou keep going your voice is so angelic"

"I am sorry maybe I should chose different song, because this one reminds me of ehm"

I remembered that evening three days ago and I thought to myself maybe this is why he got tears in his eyes. Lou wtf are you talking about ofc its not that, he probably just really likes this song

"Harry you are almost finished with cooking I will just go wait in the car"

"Oh okay"

I think he saw that I am uncomfortable, but I don't even know why I am. Maybe because that night meant nothing to him. Fuck. I am saying that like it meant something to me. Ofc it meant nothing. I am just really tired rn. Its nothing

After some time he came in the car. He didn't say a word. He was silent the whole drive. But when we are almost at his house like 5 min away I see him falling asleep. Shit. Fucking hell. I don't have a heart to wake him up. He worked so hard today and also he looks beautiful while sleeping. Shit Louis get your ass together.

When I parked the car I looked at him and thought that it doesn't mean anything if I carry him to the bed again. So I lifted him up and carried him to his bed, I covered him with his blanket and sat there for a few minutes, because I don't even know why. I just didn't feel like walking away. He opened his eyes slowly.

"Lou its hard for me to sleep sometimes. Could you sing me to sleep?"

I was shocked, but i thought why not

"What would you like me to sing"

"Do whatever you want"

"So I have this song I once wrote"

"Could you like come closer so I can lay on your chest, I have a really bad headache and that is what my mom used to do when I was younger"

Omfg whats going on. He is just missing his mom that's it, so I did as he said. I came closer so he could lay on me and I started singing

"You say to me your jeans don't fit
You don't feel pretty and it's hard to miss
I wish that you could see my point of view
As someone starin' back at you.."

I wrote this song few days ago. I don't even know why. I was just in the moment so I started writting what I felt.
While I was singing I saw my hand slipping on his curly hair. It was like I had no control over my body, but It seems that he liked it, because he smirked at me.

"Lou you are a really good person I hope you know that"

That warmed my heart

"You are a beautiful human harry"

But there was no response so I looked at him and saw that he fell asleep. I couldn't move, beacause he was hugging me so I just closed my eyes and fell asleep.